Two peanuts walk down the street. One was a salted.

sky's sty

A young black man walks into a KFC. He takes a quick stop in the bathroom and continues on the road to his ivy league college.

Whats hard and long and used to penetrate women? A hypodermic needle.

why was six afraid of seven? prison changes a person

How many dead babies does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Impossible, non-living organisms are incapable of moving and babies lack the brain capacity to understand how to screw in a light bulb.

A guy walks into a bar and falls.

Roses are Red Violets are blue I have short term memory loss Hey look thats my bike over there.

What did the man do when the woman broke up with him? He changed his facebook status to single.

Q. What did the Cat say to the Dog? A. "These humans are so jobless.."

whats worse than someone blowing out all your birthday candles? a piano dropping on your head.

i got 99 problems.... and aids is one

What did the wall say to the other wall? Nothing. Walls don't talk.

A fat man walks into a gym, and comes out fatter

What happen's when you give an alcoholic whiskey? He's an alcoholic, so he drinks it.

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 was a rapist.

Why does Michael J. Fox always have his martinis shaken? He thinks they taste better that way.

What is funnier than 24? The fact that you think numbers are funny?

Q: Why did the man have aids? A: He had unprotected sex with a man who had aids.

Knock Knock Who's There Seventeen Thirty Eight I'm like hey what's up hello Seen yo pretty ass soon as you came in that door I just wanna chill, got a sack for us to roll Married to the money, introduced her to my stove Showed her how to whip it, now she remixin' for low She my trap queen, let her hit the bando We be countin' up, watch how far them bands go We just set a goal, talkin' matchin' Lambos Got 56 a gram, prob' a 100 grams though Man, I swear I love her how she work the damn pole Hit the strip club, we be letting bands go Everybody hating, we just call them fans though In love with the money, I ain't never letting go And I get high with my baby (baby) I just left the mall, I'm getting fly with my baby, yeah

A little girl was curious about where people come from so she asked a very controversial question. Girl goes up to her mother and ask "Mommy, where do babies come from?" Mother replies "Ask daddy." Girl says "Daddy, where do babies come from?" Father replies "Ask the dog." Girl then goes up to her dog and says "Doggy, where do babies come from?" The dog doesn't reply because it's a dog.

What is green and has wheels? A blue car.

A Jew walks into an expensive Hotel and orders 500 dollars worth of wine.

* How many roads must a man walk down before you call him a man? * He just need to go to the Register Office and change his name to "a man"

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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