a horse is a horse. of course of course....unless its a cow

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What happens if you don't use a condom? The person you are sleeping with may get pregnant or contract some kind of STI or STD. In worse cases you or your partner may contract HIV or possibly AID's.

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HOLY SHIT, THIS ACTUALLY WORKS!! 1. Hold your breath? for 5 minutes. 2. Die

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Want to hear a joke? Women's rights

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Why did the boy drop his ice-cream? He was shot in the back, knifed in the face, kicked in the groin, poo'd on by an alpaka, had frogs stapled to his face, his hair burnt off, pushed off a cliff, eaten by a scorpian, lost his arms legs and eyeballs, squashed by a hippo, ran over by a buss, truck and cement mixer, had cement poured on his frogs (that were stapled to his face), became morbidly obese, was raped by a chicken, was served as sauce at an italian resturant, was done by his mother's father's grandson, broke both of his detatched legs, crashed his car, went into a time machine and was crushed by a stegosaurous, had a lemon squesed in his detatched eyes, got high on cokeawana, was crushed to death by a garbage disposer and was rejected by the hobo at the shelter? no, actually, he tripped

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A horse walks into a bar... The bartender says, "Why the long face?" The horse says, "I have testicular cancer........"

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What's old and has wet pants? My grandma with a bladder problem

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In an apartment complex, a black family lived on the first floor, a mexican family lived on the second floor, and a white family lived on the third floor. Suddenly, at about noon on tuseday, a giant tornado came through town and took out the entire complex, destroying everything. Why did only the white familey survive the catastophy? Because both parents were at work and the kids were in school.

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What did the white guy say when a black man punched him? Ow, i am sueing for assault. that is a crime

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What do a plum and a rabbit have in common? Their both purple. except for the rabbit

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What's the difference between toilet paper and a shower curtain? So YOU'RE the one!

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What do you get when you cross a rusty nail and a foot? Tetanus

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My left foot has 6 toes, my right face has 8 Q-tips -Matt

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guess what I'm going to Spain on my holidays

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knock, knock who's their? police get down on the ground!

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What did the little kid say to the stranger? Nothing. He was taught not to talk to strangers.

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*see an orphan* Knock knock Whos there Not you parents ...

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What happens when your school teacher gives you homework over the break? You give your teacher homework too!

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How do you get Helen Keller to keep a secret? You politely ask her not to tell anyone.

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What makes boys so stupid? They like to play with girls' hearts and break them until they spew out blood all over the place.

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Whats worse than being a jew? Having all of your friends viciously murdered at a party that you weren't invited to.

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Whats worse than the holocaust? Ryan

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what do u call a blonde in the libary? alexandra wallace

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why did the chicken cross the road? because he was trying to kill himself in the fastest and easiest way due to his drinking problems, which in the first place separated him him from his wife, who is fighting with him in court for custody of there only child ,Steven. He can not even pay the rent on his apartment or hold a job to pay child support..he is also in debt.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops