how many blondies were at the mall? none they were too busy trying to find the sun.

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Women's rights

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How do you get a one armed blonde out of a tree? You shoot at the blonde. Causing her to fall, but I have a feeling she will be pretty mad!

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Why did apple fall off the tree? Because Sally was holding on for dear life and she grab the apple. The apple was still in good condition; Sally however, not so good.

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Q: How to make a man who suffers from hypochondria want to kill himself? A: You take a shet on his face.

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Q: How do you make a five year cry twice? A: There are many ways, as children are generally not that adept at controlling their emotions. Loud noises, threats of violence, images of scary monsters... those tend to work. Be sure to let them stop crying before making them cry again, otherwise you will have only made them cry once.

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A: go away. B: No i won't A: Shutup B: Yes i will not go away A: again, shutup B: I left A: Thank you B: Your welcom A: Thank you for saying your welcome B: Thank you for saying thank you that i'm welcome A: Thank you for saying thank you for saying that I thank you that you're welcome.

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How do you get a baby to be quiet? Put it in the oven for a few minutes

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What's Kanye West's main goal in life? To dash the hopes and dreams of Taylor Swift on national television.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? ...because chickens love to confound people.

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whats the difference between this joke and other jokes other jokes have a punch line

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Why did Susie fall off the swing?? ShE had no arms. Knock knock... Whose there? Not Susie

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Hey I just met you, And this is crazy, I've got dementia, Hey I just met you.

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How did poor Miss Suzy get her poor little baby to stop crying? She cut off its head, burned its body, and sacrificed its ashes in a bizarre Satanic ritual that involved having sex with a heifer. (Miss Suzy was a Satanist priestess.)

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why did the girl moan in pain? she got punched in the face.

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Nock nock Who's there K K who? You forgot the K

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A guy went to a girl asked if she wanted to have sex with him. She said yes and they promptly had sex.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Bob Bob who? Your neighbor

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Q:So there's a black guy and a mexican sitting in a car...who's driving? A: The Cop

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roses are red , thankyou for stating that , i can now continue with gardening as it is my profession.

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whats a muslims name with a bomb to his chest Whatever his name is HAHAHAHAHAH

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What do you call a bunch of spics playing soccer? Professional soccer players.

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What did the monkey say after its tail was run over by a lawnmower? It won't be long now.

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What's red and blue and goes 105 MPH? A red and blue car.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops