In Soviet Russia my freedoms are severally restricted by communism.

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Have you ever tasted Ethiopian food? Neither have they.

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Elephants can jump higher than the tallest building. You know why? It's because buildings can't jump.

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Where did Susie go during the bombing? Everywhere

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Why can't Jeff drive a car? because he is a rock.

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Why do jews get their foreskin cut off? Because they're jewish.

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Whats worse tan finding a worm in your apple? Being touched by Michael Jackson

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Your Mum Is So Dumb, It Took Her 2 Hours To Watch 60 Minutes.

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Bill: Knock, Knock. Sean: Who's there? Bill: It's your neighbor, Bill Walters, from across the street. Sean: Oh, hey Bill, how are you and Margie? Bill: Oh, I'm doing fine, but Margie just got out of the hospital for a broken arm. Sean: My gosh, what happened. Bill: She was just loading the Halloween decorations down from the attic while I wasn't home and fell. She's fine though; it was only a minor fracture. Sean: Well thank goodness she alright. Bill: Anyway, I came over to return those hedge clippers I borrowed from you last month. Sean: Oh, thank you. How did they work? Bill: Just great once I gave them a coat of oil. It was a big job... I haven't trimmed those bushes in three years. Sean: Yeah, these clippers have belonged to my grandfather, father, and me. Bill: Darn, thats quite amazing, I wish I could get a pair of those, but I doubt they still make them. Sean: I'm pretty confident they don't, but you can borrow these anytime. Bill: Thanks Sean thats very generous of you. Sean: No problem, I almost never use them myself. Well I better get back to Jeanie...I'm helping her make dinner. Bill: Alright, Well thanks again.

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saftey torch you can out it on the porch. saftey torch put it in the hallway. saftey torch scare the monsters away. saftey torch that'll be 50 bucks.

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i'll leave 'em dead in the living room. get it leave 'em dead in the living room

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why are black people so good at basketball? because they understand the fundamentals, work hard at becoming better, and have fun playing the game/

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Q: What did the schizophrenic man say to his father? A: "Every time grandmother's urn shrieks, this pornography turns to black ink."

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Why did the chicken cross the road? because it looked both ways and saw no cars coming.

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Whats worse than the Holocaust. Nothing the Holocaust was the single worst thing to happen ever.

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http://www.com/

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What do you get when you cross an elephant and a rhino? A one-way ticket to Hell for messing with God's creations, you heathen!

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Chuck Norris counted to infinity; by calculating the sum of a divergent series.

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So I was flirting with a girl at a bar the other day when this huge black guy walks up and says "Hey honey". I realized that I still had some un-addressed prejudices in me as he shook my hand, pointed out that it was a mistake anyone could make, and introduced me to a girl he had met at the college he works at.

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If woman that have big breasts work at Hooters, then do woman with one leg work at Ihop?

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What happend when they were 3 guys in the air? They were skydiving

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What happened to the little boys house? It burned down. How did the boy die? In the fire.

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What did the poor family eat for thanksgiving? Food

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Why did the black kid die? He had cancer.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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