What has four legs and rocks? Your baby kitten that just got stoned to death.

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why can't hellen keller eat a pizza? because she is dead.

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When I die, I want to die like my grandfather who died peacefully in his sleep. Not screaming like all the passengers in his car.

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Why did the plane crash? because there were two towers in front of it.

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This is the same thing you told me once, believe me, it helps holding into it.

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What has eyes but cannot see? A blind man.

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I worship you Nero, and I wont even begin to explain myself why.

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Q: What's worse than ten babies stapled to one tree? A: One baby stapled to ten trees.

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How do you make a unicorn? Jab a stick through a pink horse and name it Liam

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Where do you find a vegetable? Where you left him

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Whats worse than a worm in your apple? -slavery

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Q: Why did the crazy man stare at the orange juice container? A: Because it started talking.

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whats black and hangs from my tree a plum

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What do you can a preschool on fire? A very dangerouse situation

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What do a bike and a human have in common they are both objects

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So, theoretically, if we controlled the media, what would be different then?

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Why did the whale cross the road? He was being chased by the Japanese.

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Why couldn't the girl go to the bathroom? Because she was obese.

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Who won in a game of Brawl... Holden

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What did the doctor say to the recently diagnosed AIDS patient? I'm sorry there is nothing we can do.

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A Homosexual, a platypus, and a rubber spoon walk into a bar...

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What's the difference between a cheeseburger and a dead baby............I don't j!zz on the cheeseburger before I eat it.

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Q: Why was the man upset? A: He was kidnapped. Two cruel men tied him to a chair in an unknown location. This man was mistaken for someone who was planning to steal a big drug shipment. They beat him unmerciful, shocked him, and hit him in the head with a hammer, and threw him out in the street, with the belief of his death occurring. A driver stopped to help the man into the nearby hospital. The man was questioned about the physical appearance and whereabouts of these criminals. He remembered nothing, and sadly, they got away with this horrible crime.

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What do you call a cat up a tree in a party hat? A cat up a tree with a party hat

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops