Pants and God shorts: God: Jews ur my people nao! Jews: Yay we are Gods chosen people! Riches and gRape awaits us! World domination next! God: Well, not quite what I meant but, err... Close enough? Jews: YAY! Moral: So much for "the chosen ones" :(

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What's the difference between a Jew and a Canoe Well one is a human, beating heart, and the other is a small boat you row in

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Why did the boy commit scuicide? Because he was mentaly scared due to constant tormenting and teasing from his friends

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Why did the chicken cross the road? How the hell should i know, i do not speak chicken.

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What did the clinically depressed man get for Christmas? He received many of splendid gifts and a joyous day with his family. He realized that his life isn't so bad after all, and went home with his head held high. He was then eaten by a vicious looking 7.

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where's my tractor.

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Why was the 3 year old high He was flying

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Whats worse than the holocaust? Anal.

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How many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie pop? I dont know so why are you asking?

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What is worse than getting hit by a bus? 9/11

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Two whales are in a bar. One says, "whoaohaoahwoahwahoh" The other says, "Go home, Frank. You're drunk."

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So a platypus walks into a bar. He orders a drink and then goes home drunk. His wife doesn't approve of his drinking, so she took her children then left. The lonely platypus wandered around for days on end in the lonely silence. He realized he wanted a job, but he couldn't get one, and i lied. it wasnt a platypus. it never even haooened i wasted your time.

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What if someone sold your socks to a Jew? I would blackflip through the air and shit on his chest.

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Whats bright red and claws at the window? Baby in a microwave.

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Yeah, Eliza, its me, its so strange, you are the only one I remember from highschool, I was worried you had forgotten about me, anyway, yeah type as if you where speaking to him, and dont worry, I know I could not keep a secret back then, and I told Nero, so and he promised me he would kindly break my fingers if I told anyone, besides I dont do that anymore trust me.

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What could be worse than a giant paint bubble? The Holocaust.

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what's the best way to get your younger sibling to stop being annoying? Shoot Him

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i am writing this because i felt like it.

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Knock, Knock Who's There? An Orange No Seriously Who Are You?

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knock knock There's no door

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

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that awkward moment when your teachers a duck

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What do you call a bathtub full of dead babies? A tradegy.

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The cast of the 'Jersey Shore' is the worst thing to happen to the Jersey shore

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops