There was a little boy in kindergarten who really had to go to the bathroom. So he asked his teacher if he could go to the bathroom, and she told him he could go at snack time. The little boy really had to go to the bathroom, so he asked his teacher again, and like before, she told him to wait until it was snack time. The little boy had to go very very badly and asked the teacher one more time. This time the teacher said "if you can say the alphabet, then you can go to be bathroom" so the little boy got up all his courage and started off with "A,B,C,D,E,F,G,H,I,J,K,L,M,N,O,P,Q,R,S,T,U,V,W,X,Y and Z." Then the teacher said,"good job" and let him go to the bathroom. When he went there was a man waiting in the stall who brutally raped and murdered the boy.

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What did the Chicken say to the Turkey Nothing, Chickens don't talk.

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What did the dead man say? Nothing because dead human beings have no beating heart and do not live so they cannot speak.

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ROSES ARE RED VIOLETS ARE BLUE I HAVE AIDS NOW YOU DO TOO

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Why did the chicken cross the road? What does chicken mean?

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A horse walked into a bar. The bartender asked, "Why the long face?" The horse said nothing because it doesn't understand human language.

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How long does it take to paint a house with babies? It matters how hard you throw them.

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Why do dogs chase squirrels? Beacuse dogs have very low attention spands and also chase cars and cats.

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You know why Michael J. Fox makes really good milkshakes? ... because he uses the best ingredients

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What did the T Rex say to the pterodactyl? ROIRWR!!!

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What do you call an Arab driving a Plane? A Pilot.

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What do you do when life gives you Oranges? You make lemonade and life wonders how you did it

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no really what are ur names?

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Why was the Black person afraid of the chainsaw? Be cause it goes run nigga nigga run nigga nigga run

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Yo mamma is so dumb, she bought a Wii and was satisfied with her purchase

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Why did Rosie drop her ice cream? She was hit by a bus...

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Why are trees green? I have no idea

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Why can't Stevie Wonder read? He has retinopathy of prematurity and was born blind.

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A wise man once said...... I am a wise man

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whats sad about a ton of blacks in a limo going off a cliff. they'll destroy the car

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Bill: Heydidyouknowlosersaywhat Donny: What? Bill: Loser

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Llega San Pedro le dice a dios y se va.

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Oh na na not today Oh na na maybe tommrow

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a cat walks into a bar and orders a bowl of milk. the cat is then escorted out of the bar because a cat in a bar is unsanitary. and they do not serve milk.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops