Why did the bird fall out of the sky, It hit one of the random green pipes.

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Yo' momma is so fat, that- Wait. Sorry. Too far?

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why did the chicken cross the road? the sudden lack of sidewalk dictated as such.

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A man walks into a bar, gets caught in a knife fight, and dies horribly. The funeral was closed casket.

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Why was Timmy crying? because his impaled his dog while in a drunken rage

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A man dies on the operating table and finds himself in front of the Pearly Gates. St Peter looks at him and says " You are having a hallucination due to all the drugs they have given you and because your brain releases chemicals when you die. I am not real and there is not heaven or a god." Upon resuscitation the man contemplates his hallucination and becomes an Atheist.

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PS: Call me a monster, The Devil, a Psychopath, but know this... For those of you that decide to become my pray by not choosing the right side... ...I have far since surpassed any state of fear, of evil, of darkness that you can think off... What you call fear and suffer now, is but mere entertainment for me, and in not too long, you shall remember those deepest horrors which you carry, as the last pleasure you remembered. Moral: Stand by my side those of you which desire to become the children of darkness, and I shall show you pleasure and love, for those that reject pleasure and love, are, and shall moreso become those which we hunt for whichever deprived desire that lies in the soul, in the name of love and respect for their lack of desire for love of course, as no desire for love, is to embrace the eternal desire of fear, as your heavenly father used to say, "surrender to darkness and fear" It wont be a choice soon, its not as if you humans ever where in control of your fears and nightmares. Amen? That only means let it happen... I will make it so. SOLVE media: Down the rabbit hole, coincidence you say... If this world experiences "coincidences", IT IS BECAUSE I MAKE THEM HAPPEN ON PURPOSE.

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A redundant man walked into a bar. He sat down, and unfortunately, we learn 5 minutes later that his wife died.

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Mom I am so sorry I molested you yesterday. Im not your mom! Phew, wanna go out?

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because his farmer was abusive.

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Why doesnt the chicken wear any pants? His pecker is on his head

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How do you stop a dog from barking? Cut it's head off

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Why couldn't the black baby swim? Babies do not posses the muscular capacity nor technique to enable them to properly swim.

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What do you call a terrorist on 9/11? A terrorist.

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9/11

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Why hasn't little Johnny ever had a clown at his birthday party? Johnny is an underprivileged Hispanic member of the community.

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A dog walks into the local newspaper to place an ad. The dog writes; "woof woof, woof woof woof." Receptionist: You know you can ad another two woofs for the same price? Dog: Well that wouldn't make any sense at all?

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A black man, a Asian, and a Jew fell into a pit and because of a lack of water they all died.

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My grandma's star sign was cancer, and it was really ironic how she died, actually... She was attacked by a giant crab.

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Q. What did the mockingbird say to the blue jay? A. I mock you by mocking you

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Where do you find a dog with no legs? Right where you left him.

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Have you seen Andrea Bocelli's new house? No. He hasn't either.

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Q: What's full of different butts and smells bad? A: An ashtray.

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What did the jew say to the black man? Nothing they were in a mall that got invaded by evil trees.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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