Knock knock. Who is there? The FBI. They have a warrant for your arrest.

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what to call someone thats gay zak

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Who didn't let the gorilla into the ballet? The people who were in charge of that decision.

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Susie had no arms and no legs.. what did she get for Christmas? Cancer. Amy was riding on a swing.. who was pushing her? Not Susie.

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If Sally has 4 apples and Dan has 3 apples, how many apples do they have together? Red, because ducks have 2 legs.

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why was six afraid of seven? because seven raped six's mom.

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How many chickens does it take to cross the road? It only takes 1 chicken to cross the road. You don't need a lot.

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War horse walks into a bar. The barman says 'why the long film?'

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Roses are red Violets are FUCKING VIOLET NOT FUCKING BLUE

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What did the mentally disabled child say to the snowman? Mnnghhhmuhmuhhu ooh ooh ooh!

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What did the furry tweet when he went to a furry convention? A: I'm at a furry convention

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What do you do if you see a cat crossing the street? Hit it of course!

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What's worse than finding a worm in the apple you're eating? Many things could be worse than that, from the less severe e.g. Finding half a worm in the apple you're eating to the more severe, such as the total collapse of civilization.

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2 black people and a mexican are in a car. Who's driving? The black person because they decided it would save gas if they all carpooled to their job.

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Why did the Chicken Cross the Road? The Light was red.

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I want to tie a baby to the back of a truck then reverse into a wall.

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What's bad about the the 3 black Jews that just died...... They were my friends

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What's clear and wet?? Water (I think)

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Why couldn't the cat drink the milk? Because it had no face.

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a blond and a brunet jump of a bridge who hits the ground first ....... the brunet because the blond has to ask for directions

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Man 1: What's the difference between an elephant and a mailbox? Man 2: I don't know. Man 1: You'd make a terrible postman

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There's a black guy in a house. What's he doing there? He owns it.

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Q:Where was The Declaration of Independence signed? A: At the bottom

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What does a lonely man do on opposite day? I don't know. Why should we know what he does, that is both weird and illegal. Stalking is a serious crime and should not be used. We do not know what he does on normal days, thus we cannot come to a conclusion to this question. However, I do hypothesize that he must be social on this day because this is the opposite of lonely.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops