a termite walks into a bar and asks, "wheres the bar tender?"

Osama bin Laden walks into a bar. Just joking, he's dead.

women's rights, lol

What's worst than finding a worm in your apple? Nickleback.

Q. How many puns does it take to make a cup of tea? A. None. A pun is a grammatical construct and as such is incapable of combining the ingredients necessary to generate a hot drink which has been popular for hundreds of years.

A tree falls over on an old woman. Mysteriously, the woman lifts the tree up and walks away. A man is amazed by this, so he goes and asks the woman how she managed to lift the whole tree. She tells the man that he is an idiot an walks away. Later inspecting the tree, he realizes it is a small sapling weighing no less than 10 pounds

What did the mental patient say to the apple? Hi, my name is Chris.

Why did the boy climb the tree? To get to the top. - Driiiftz

hi hi stop! no yes no no stop no grr lol i will get you back not if i fool grrrrrrr BOOM BOOMBOTH:GRRR BOOM BOOM lol lol both:grrrr THE END BY STICK SMOKER

why did the golfer ware two ares of paents. if he got a hole in one

PEANIS!

I also wanted to write a joke but I forgot it so here I am. Minecraft rocks and everyone who says otherwise is a noob

Fun Fact: If humans stood in a single file line around the equator, most of them would drown.

What do you call a bear in an elevator?...A fire hazard.

What does it mean if your born on opposite day? you have sids

When life gives you lemons.... Don't eat them, because you're probable hallucinating, and you don't know where they came from.

why was 6 afraid of 7? because 7 was black

"Horse walks into a bar... Bartender says It's probably not a good idea that you're in here. You're a very large animal. Any sudden movements, you may injure somebody. I don't know why you're here. None of the glasses are ergonomically designed for you to drink from them. So, you should probably leave."

daughter and boyfriend havin sex baby baby baby ohhh!! mum walks in; what you doin signin to justin bieber,oh ok just make sure you dont sing to his song its crap!!!!!!!

*Knock knock* I thought no one was home so I left... Turns out my grandma hung herself

What does a black car thief do with a stolen car? Drive it

penispenispenispenispenispenispenispenispenispenispenispenispenispenispenispenispenispenispenispenispenispenispenispenispenispenispenispenispenis

A man walks into a bar. He is an alcohol and it is killing his family.

What is exceptionally dangerous? Shaving while taking a bath, because the risk of electrocution is extremely high.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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