where was the heart of ocean found. madelain mcanns urn

Roses are red Violets are red Shit My garden's on fire?

yo mama is so ugly she walked by a mirror and looked at her reflection cuz thats what mirrors do

Your cat was in pain after after a stack of books suddenly fell on it. It's pain is extra-strong so you give it ExtraStrength Tylenol. Guess what happens next time? Nothing. It takes only 50mg to 60mg of Tylenol to poison a cat. 1 ExtraStrength Tylenol tablet is about 10 times that amount (500mg). You killed your cat. It's dead now and there is no "next time"..

Two straight men walk into a gay bar and promptly forget why they went to a gay bar when they are both clearly heterosexual.

What's as red as a Lobster? A Lobster

What do you call a handsome nerd? The name that is on his birth certificate.

Why was the 6 year old girl crying? Her step-dad kicked her in the face.

Why did the blonde go to business school? She wanted to get into business, and decided that a business degree was a good place to begin.

"Knock Knock" "You know the doorbell is working?" "Oh, well, you know I'm here now. May I come in?" "Yes, have a cup of tea"

Starting a Genocide #YOLO

I popped my head over my sexy neighbour's fence today to see her lying in her bikini. "Wow, you're gorgeous!" I burst out, "I hope you know how to do CPR." "Why?" she asked with a giggle, "Because I've taken your breath away?" "No," I replied. "I've just run your son over out front."

Why did Kelliintheraw get punched in the face? Because she is a dumbass

Friends are like balloons.. If you stab them they die.

Cows are land manatees.

Roses are red violets are blue this poem makes no sense refrigerator.

What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for christmas? Nothing. His parents are dead and Santa doesn't exist.

Why did the black man buy ten packets of Kool-Aid at the supermarket? Because it is a refreshing beverage that many individuals enjoy drinking.

Why was Andy's resume declined? Because he was molested as a child.

I think poop is tasty... just kidding.

What's black and white and red all over? A penguin after being attacked by a man with a mace.

A man walked into the woods with alzheimers......pancakes

How many Jew can you fit in a car? As many as the car seats comfortably.

What is white and will kill you if it fell out of a tree? Charles Manson

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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