Why couldn't the dwarf mother reach for the top shelf? Her height was at a mini-mum.

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How much cocaine did Charlie Sheen do? Enough to kill two and a half men

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The man says to the doctor "Sir, I have contracted a terrible headache." The doctor replies back, "Yes you do."

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An Irishman, an Englishman and a Scott land on an island. They were on vacation and returned to the UK, which consists of two isles.

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Q:If a tree falls in the forest and nobody is here to hear it, will it make a noise A:That Philosopher probably had a lot of herbal tea in the morning

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What do a Jew and a homeless man both have in common? They both get nothing for Christmas

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Person 1:"Knock Knock" Person 2: Whos there.... Wait why did you literally say the words "Knock Knock" Person 1: I have no idea

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Man #1: What was the hardest part about watching that kid get hit by that bus? Man #2: My dick...

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A black man and a white man and a chinese man are sitting together: Cultural Diversity.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.

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Whats the same about a Mole and an Eagle? They both live underground, I lied about the Eagle.

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SteVen Hawking wals into a bar

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Having a giant, angry ape on steroids rip your heart out and eat it before your eyes as you painfully die from the unbearable pain and rapid blood loss.

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why was the little girl crying in her dads arms? Because he was strangling her

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My girlfriend dumped me because I'm patronizing. That means I treat people like they're stupid.

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Wright flyer

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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What's sad about 2 black men driving off a cliff? They were my friends.....

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Why did they call the woman crazy? because she drowned her children in a lake.

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What did the boy with cancer get for christmas? -A haircut

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Why did the man walk into the grocery store? Because he had run out of peanut butter

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Sammi suck kyles chode

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How did little Jimmy survive the 20 story fall? He couldn't he died from the last fall, aren't you paying attention?

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A plane crashes in the wilderness on the border of Canada and the U.S. Where do they bury the survivors? I lied. There were none.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops