A wise man once told me that friends are like cookies. He was a cannibal.

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,try this on a girl, say "can I pop your cherry.........soda bottle cap off your cherry soda bottle?"

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I will see it when I believe it, as far as your order or whatever goes, I have already taken a look, and its nothing for me, you hide behind idealism yet use cruel methods and inhuman tactics in order to justify your means, you hide behind a shell of fucking "charm" and employ people to harass others. YOU ARE NO FUCKING BETTER THAN THE REST! YOU ARE BENEATH ME! As for that sister fucking bullshit, joke is on you, I do not have a sister! I bet that was one of your fucking "Nero`s" all six billion of your fucking personality disorders. Moral: I am the FUCKING MORAL MAN! And while I do not have a sister to rape, ill get down with yours.

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Q: What did the train say when it sneezed twice? A: Trains are inanimate objects, thus they cannot sneeze or talk. Are you an idiot?

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How many babies does it take to paint a wall It depends on how hard you throw them

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What's brown and sticky? Feces.

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if a tree falls in the forest does it make a sound? if a tree falls in the forest and it falls on a mime, does anyone care?

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A gay man walks out of his bedroom, rubbing his ass in pain. He says, "I hate it when I slip and fall in the shower."

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I once walked into my grandmas house to find her laying face down on the ground. It turns out that everyone was planking but grandma wasn't breathing...

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How did the Mexican got into USA? Trough the border.

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Poems are great but sometimes they don't make refridgerater

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Q: Why are black people afraid of Chainsaws? A: Because it could kill them as it could any other individual.

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How does Cee Lo Green order extra ketchup? Can I have some more ketchup, please?

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What's green and fuzzy, and if it fell out of a tree it could kill you? A Pool Table.

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Is it colder on a farm than in the winter?

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What do you call a black man that works in a church A priest

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What did the Zen Buddhist say in the hamburger store? He said, "Make me one with everything."

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WHERE WAS THE DECLARATION OF INDEPENTENTS AT THE BOTTEM!!!

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why did the dog bark at the picture because it was ugly

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Q: why did the blind man walk off the bridge? A: because he was blind.

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Why did george washington not make it to the prom? because george washington is dead

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What do you call a black man who flys an airplane? A Pilot

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How do you change you dishwasher into a snowblower? Give her a shovel.

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A Muslim walks into a bomb shop. Unfortunately for the bomb shop owner, the Muslim was a police officer. He proceeded to arrest the owner and the employees of the store, as it turned out that the selling of these particular explosive devices were illegal. They ended up in jail, and justice was served.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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