Q: What did the kid with no arms and legs get for Christmas. A: A bicycle.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he is a chicken and is not intelligent enough to know that he is about to be hit by a bus while hopelessly searching for food under an elderly man's nose.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What did the heroin addict get for Christmas? Aids from a used needle.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

HOW DO YOU KILL A BLACK MAN? YOU DONT

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Women's rights

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Why was the girl stupid? Because she had a low IQ

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What do you call a dead cow? Dead Meat.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

How many dead babies does it take to paint a wall? Depends. How hard can you throw?

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Q. Why did the triceratops die? A. A giant meteor hit him.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

How many dead babies does it take to screw in a lightbulb? None, a dead baby is a horrible sight and shouldn't be laughed at.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Did you know that if you say "gullible" slowy, it still sounds like you're saying "gullible."

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What's Green and invisible? This cabbage --------------------------->>>>>

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Why doesn't the boy get anything for Christmas? His parents died the night before!

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Awesome! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> minecraftnow.us <

thumb_up thumb_down -5

why does little Lucy have no friends? because she is in a wheelchair

thumb_up thumb_down -5

what do jews like the most? money, because they're all greedy fat nosed cunts

thumb_up thumb_down -5

A man and his friend are talking. The man says, "You know what's funny? Sometimes you mean to say one thing and you say a completely different thing. Like the other day I wanted to buy a ticket to pittsburgh, but the lady I was buying it from had very large breasts, so I accidentally said 'Can I have a picket to titsburgh?'" And the other guy says, "Yeah, man, it's really funny you say that, the other day I meant to ask my wife to pass the salt, and I said 'you whore, you ruined my life'"

thumb_up thumb_down -5

I america you read books. But in Soviet Russa, Books read YOU!!!!!!!!!!!!

thumb_up thumb_down -5

A horse enter a bar, and the barman says: "why the long face?" The horse has cancer

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Why did the woman spray a black man in the eyes with pepper spray, then promptly run away? Because the woman was a notorious criminal and was currently robbing the man's house, but was caught in the act so she used pepper spray as her last line of defense while she fled from the scene before the man could call the police to detain her and put her in prison for her crimes.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Some people devote their life to talking in their head. Jesus christ.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Whats worse than getting raped by a monkey The fact that you actually got raped by a monkey

thumb_up thumb_down -5

D/M/Y ~~ Take 21/12/2012 Flip it upside down Take the 2's out from both ends (1/12/201) Take out all the ones and two's (//0) Take your zero and turn it 90 degrees to the right Take out the forward slashes What you are left with, a potato.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

How do you save the world in 2012? You aren't. 2012 isn't going to happen!

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops