Alice, seriously do as I say, I lived with the man for over 16 years, those are not hallucinations, its PTSD, without ritalin he will just go trough that agony for nothing, not coffee not chocolate or any of that, anything that helps his focus. Seriously do not be a bitch Alice, listen to him and do as he says. Its not the first time people think he is having hallucinations when his eyes start moving back and forth like crazy, he is not seeing things, he is experiencing this as if they where real, and just because he can stay in that state for days, does not mean he is meant to go trough that kind of agony because of your ethics or caring or whatever your hesitation might be, the man can go without food for weeks if he has to, but not after you sneak trash like Zopiclone into his system. That was a mistake of yours, make up for it Alice, or ill make you pay.

How do you make your friends more positive ? Infect them with HIV.

What would Walt Disney be if he were still alive today? Still anti-semetic

What did the Carbon atom say to the Oxygen atom? Nothing, basic elements are incapable of speech. It requires a culmination of many atoms to form a living human capable of speaking to another human.

Roses are red Violets are blue Black people are black They are inferior

What did the blind man say to the bartender? Nothing, I forgot to mention he's also mute and has no legs.

What did the bartender say to the three-legged Irishman? What can I get you?

Im batman...suck it losers

What's pink and fluffy? Pink fluff.

What do you call a Muslim flying a plane? A pilot for Arabian Air, idiot. What were you thinking?

Q. Why is the road black? A. One hundred million dollars!

Whatd the boner say to the limp dick get your head up kid

So a Jewish Family wakes into a German Pizzeria. They were very satisfied with the service and ended up tipping the waiter 20%

why did the mexican beat your ass larry clark III because you live in a apartment with your mom and dad who are black your dad has a truck your mom recked her car

What do you call a man with no arms and no legs? A man with no arms and no legs

Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't. It was a footless chicken.

What kind of nun would never drink milk? One who suffers from a severe lactose intolerance.

don't repeat this joke!don't repeat this joke!don't repeat this joke!don't repeat this joke!don't repeat this joke!

You Mom is so ugly, It makes sense why you always have that look on your face!

Why did the man staple his own scrotum to his left thigh? He didn't. His friends did.

If i was a painting... Id hang myself

Whats worse than dying? Nothing.....?

A dyslexic man hears a joke, and laffs.

what is friendship? when friends go on a ship

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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