What do you call a flying Jew? Smoke

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What do you call a man with no arms and no legs? Steve

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Q: Why was the boy so sad? A: His parents were just killed in a car wreck, therefore orphaning him and his five brothers and sisters and leaving them with no money, food, or shelter due to lack of steady income and the fact that their house had been foreclosed on.

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There were two smokestacks, a little one and a big one. One day, the little one said to the big one, "I'm tired of being the lesser of two smokestacks!"

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why did the monkey cross the road? it escaped from a local zoo a block away

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Scott Scott who? Scott Henderson. Oh my god Scotty! I haven't seen you since highschool, please come in.

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Every first letter of an innappropriate body part is how it actually looks like: Penis, Vagina, Boobs

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A man calls his wife, but she doesn't pick up. He comes home and shouts his wife's name, but no one responds. He walks upstairs and sees the bedroom door half-opened. He enters and sees his wife sleeping.

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How do you tell the difference between a pig and a sea pig? If you open your mouth and it fills with water, you are an idiot

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A group of blondes rent a car and decide to drive to Disney World. Along the highway, they see a sign reading "Disney World left." They exit the highway, turn left, and enjoy their well-deserved vacation from practicing law.

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An Asian, white, and a black man decide to play Russian Roulette. The Asian goes first and shoots himself in the head. The white man picks up the gun for his turn. The black man runs down the street screaming. Cops see him and the white man holding the gun, both are sent to jail for life for the murder of their friend.

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What do you get if you mix a Bulldog and a Shih Tzu? A new breed of dog.

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What do Bruce Lee and Michael Jackson have in common? They are both dead

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I ran in to Hitler. "Hey, Hitler, what's up?" I asked. "Well, this time I am going to kill 6 million Jews and 2 clowns." "Two clowns?" I ask. "Why two clowns?" "See!" He exclaimed. "No one cares about the Jews!"

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Chuck Norris doesn't call the wrong number. He looks it up first to make sure he's got it right before dialing.

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This sentence is not humorous in any fashion whatsoever.

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What do you call a big group of Chinese people on Mars? An extraordinary feat for the Chinese space program and a historic day in human history, where a particular country has set up the first human colony on another planet and we have proven to ourselves that our race is capable of interplanetary travel and can accomplish anything if we set our minds to it.

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Two Muffins in an oven One muffin looks at the other muffin and says: "Oohhhh it's hot in here!". Then the other muffin says: "Oohhhh a talking muffin!"

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Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a WAFFLE!

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Looks like this is a *puts on sunglasses* Pair of sunglasses

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Why did the girl fall from the swing? She was laughing at an anti-joke.

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"i see", said the blind man ... ...to his deaf wife... ...while his crippled children jumped for joy....

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what is the difference between a black man and a white man? Their skin color.

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WHO LET THE DOGS OUT?!?!?!!! Not Michael Vick.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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