Why do undertakers wear ties? Because their profession is very serious, and it is important that their appearance has a degree of gravitas

A girl walks out of a bar then gets raped.

knock knock who's there? Madeline McCann really? no

What does an emu an a kiwi have in common? Both are flightless birds endemic to there own countries.

Your mom is so fat that she enjoys junk food regularly.

A brown haired girl and a blonde girl are driving through a cornfield. Because of this illegal activity, they are sent to court and given 8 years in the state prison.

I’m on the new Seefood Diet… I can only eat Fish or shell fish

What do you call cat that is on fire? Nigel.

"Knock Knock" "Who's there?" "Me. May I come in?" "Yes, you may."

Banana Hamock.

Your momma so poor, she has a hard time paying her bills.

What's worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? Biting into a worm and finding an apple.

What's black, white and red all over? A race war

What's black and white and red all over? A bloody zebra.

Hello.

Wanna know something funny? Your face

What's sad about 5 black men falling off a cliff? The master has no slaves.

What is worse than finding an Apple in your Worm? Watching your dog jumping of a cliff

why cant helen keller drive? because cars werent popularly accepted when she lived.

What did the deaf, dumb, blind, black kid get for Christmas? Modern Warfare 3.

knock knock

How do you get your girlfriend to become more enthusiastic about swallowing? Stick your dick in Ben & Jerry's Cherry Garcia ice cream.

Whats the similarity between your mom and me We are both men except for your mom

When life hands you lemons... do not squeeze them, for juice may squirt into your eye, causing severe pain.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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