an athiest walks into a church

He was. I am sorry, he knows to much, this is for the well being of everyone, including yourself, he will be going down, the order has been given.

What do Kim Kardashian and a broken-down horse have in common? They will both eat oats out of your hand.

A horse walks into a bar, and orders a drink. The bartender is amazed at first, but then remembers that he just did acid.

What did the Japanese man do to the pizza? He ate it.

How long did it take the world's most powerful democracy to elect a black President? Less than a day.

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says "why the long face?" The horse says "i have aids."

What's under the first mate? The second mate.

how do you get blondes to drown? stick a mirror to the bottom of the pool

What did the president do for the people? ...

What did one cat say to another? Cats cant talk

Waiter. there's a fly in my soup! I apologize, I'll bring you a new one immediately.

why did billy fall down? Because he is mentaly retarted and was just plain stupid.

Q: What's worse than falling off a mountain A: Falling off a mountain into a pile of spikes

yo mama so stupid, she went to the super bowl an bought a spoon

Two gorillas walked into a bar and it hurt

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he clearly has an owner that doesn't fence him in.

How did Steve Jobs die? Of cancer, in a bed, and surrounded by his loved ones.

why doesn't mexico have an olypics because theyre already running,swimming and jumping over the border

Yo mama's so fat, she's at risk for a number of obesity related disseases, including diabetes, hypertension, and heart dissease.

WHAT????

A man walks into a bar. He is then rushed to the emergency room for severe blunt force trauma to the head and multiple cranial fractures. After years of mental therapy the man re-gains full cerebral capabilities and is extremely cautious to keep an eye out for potentially dangerous bars that present a threat to his fragile reconstructed skull.

YO MAMA SO SHORT she should really consider wearing long tunic-like blouses, prints that contain vertical stripes, and heeled shoes with a pointed toe in order to create the illusion of length to her silhouette. That having been said, society's limited definition of beauty is quite inadequate for the diverse and progressive world in which we live.

Why did the police suspect a Hispanic man of theft? Because they found his fingerprints at the scene.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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