Why'd the man walk his dog His pen ran out of ink

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Friends are like snow; they disappear when you pee on them.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she had no arms Knock knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

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Are you from Tenessee? I heard you were from there

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Why was Little Billy crying? He had an axe embedded in his chest.

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What do you call it when a Priest, a Rabbi, and a Vicar meet for a drink at the bar? A social gathering.

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We live in a world.... Yeah its called Earth.

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Why did little Johnny fall off his swing? He had no arms.

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How long does it take a black woman to have a baby? Nine months, give or take a few days depending on whether she goes into labour early or not.

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Eiiiiijajajaajaja EIIIIJAAAA

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What does Helen Keller order at McDonalds? Food.

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Why wouldn't Jimmy ever eat his vegetables at dinner? As a young boy, Jimmy watched as a robber entered his house, suffocated his mother by clogging her airway with a cucumber, and escaped with their life savings.

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columbus laid an egg. he was very proud of it, but the other dudes ate it.

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Jenny tried out for the school play. She got a callback the next day. Her father had died.

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How do you make a basketball team short You cut off their legs

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Roses are red, violets are blue, the little midget is coming for you. If you don't run and if you don't hide, you will probably be stepped on because of my incredible big size.

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Why did the Asian eat rice? Because its food

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Why do vampires drink blood? Maybe if they existed you could ask one.

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What Do You Call The White House When Obama Is President? What? The White House.

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What can an elevator do that a mexican can't? Raise a family.

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Q: How do you confuse a blonde? A: Kill her entire family.

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A racist guy walks into a bar. Gets drunk, and cracks jokes. Then proceeds to get the shit kicked out of him.

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run farther?

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a terrorist walks into a bank and says "gimme all the money or ill kill you" the bank owner said you and what army the terrorist said this army and no one came in buuuut he opened hi jacket and there was a bomb straped to him then he exploded it Buuuuuuut in hell he thinks hang on a minute i didn't get my money oh for goodness sake Buuuuuuuuuuut in heaven the bank man said i still live in a wonderfull place and anywhay we had no money left and i was going to suiside soooooooooooooooooooooooo you done me a favour and if i would of suiside i could of gone to hell but you killed me so i edidnt go to hell buuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuut you did lol by the way i just wasted your time

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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