What starts with f and end in uck Firetruck

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A man dressed in a business suit goes into a doctor's office. He asks the receptionist how much a vasectomy would cost. After a minute of her looking it up on the computer she turns to him and says "The procedure will cost $750." He then thanks her and leaves.

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what happened when a duck flew over the hunter during duck hunting season? the hunter shot at the bird, but fortunately, the hunter was nit very good so the duck flew back to his wife and children by the pond.

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What is black, white and red all over? An interracial couple that has been shot and murdered.

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Q: what happed to the squirrel that lost his nuts? A: it died

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Knock, Knock. Who's there Hey, it's Dave. Oh well come on in.

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I got a boner from the waitress touching my shoulder, please dislike this

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A father was driving with his son. The Son asked " have you been in a car accident in the past 10 years"? The father replys " did you know you HAD 4 siblings"?

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What's worse than a dog peeing on your new flower garden? A terrorist attack.

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Would anyone like to contribute to my slush fund?

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Q: Why did Suzie fall off the swing? A: She had no arms. Knock-knock? Who's there? Not Suzie.

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What happens every 5 seconds? An African kid dies.

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A Man walks in to a bar and orders a pint of lager, he notices something floating on the top of his drink so he calls over the bartender. "Excuse me, I think there's something in my dr-" The man's sentence was cut short as a man with a gun had just walked into the bar. He killed everyone, there were no survivors.

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How do u know that your obese ? People stare at you

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How do you make someone to go away from you? You rape them How do you get santa to not give you presents anymore? You rape him How do you get the easter bunny to stop coming to your house? Friend: you rape him? No, you ask him politly to leave.

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Why couldnt the car move? It got blown up by a tank.

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Roses are gold Violets are blue I am color blind

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why do jewish people have big noses? because air is free

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Why was the youtube like bar green? Because the graphics designer felt like making it green. =.=

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Why did the koahla fall out of the tree? It died.

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whats chinese noodles

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Why did the crack head cross the road? To get crack.

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what's the difference between an abortion clinic and my basement? there are more dead fetuses in my basement

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Whats the worst thing about seeing a truck being snapped in half? It was mine

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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