i once thought i could do crytal meth but then i thought naw better not

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Q: Why is Abu Soooo Dank? A: Because he scores too many left-foot bangers

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Whats worse than burning jews? jews that are alive

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to boys are playing football 1 ses pass tje over ses pass wot

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A: Hey ask me if Im a fire truck? B: Are you a Fire Truck? A: No why would you ask that?

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How do you make a little boy get off a swing? You are an adult and perhaps it is inappropriate for you to be on a swing, especially when it is already occupied by a child of the right age.

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A biology teacher walks into a bar. "Ouch," he says. "I bet I just lost some brain cells. I wonder if any of them were going through mitosis..."

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If you don't see any banners here, it doesn't mean they aren't here.

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why do people play xbox 360's? because there poor people who cant afford a ps3

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What do you call a blonde with big breasts? A woman. Some call her "mom".

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Q: Why is Santa's sack so big? A: Because he only cums once a year

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An airplane has 100 bricks on-board. If you drop one brick, how many bricks would be left? 99 -------------------------------------------------------------------- How do you put a giraffe inside a refrigerator? Open the refrigerator, put the giraffe inside, close the refrigerator. -------------------------------------------------------------------- How do you put an elephant inside a refrigerator? Open the refrigerator, take out the giraffe, put the elephant inside, close the refrigerator. -------------------------------------------------------------------- The Lion King gathered all the animals from the land to a meeting. Everyone came, except one. Who was the animal? The elephant. He's still inside the refrigerator. ------------------------------------------------------------------- You want to cross a river, but you know that there are crocodiles there. There is no bridge, vines to swing from, etc. How do you cross the river? Swim across the river. The crocodiles are at the meeting with The Lion King. ------------------------------------------------------------------- So you swimmed over the river, but how did you still die? You were hit by the brick falling from the airplane.

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why did chuck norris walk on water? because he's chuck norris

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My friend Edward found a worm in his apple. Edward happened to be a lemur. Lemurs eat both plants and worms, so he ate them both.

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Chuck Norris played Russian Roulette with a fully loaded gun and suffered from a self-inflicted gunshot wound in his head, he is being treated by medical professionals

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Q: What is better than sex? A: A relationship where you can be completely intimate with your partner

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Why did the Indian homosexual shoot his dog? Because it was old

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How did the polar bear get the bottle of coke? He killed the little boy

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- Knock knock - Excuse me, I don't have time, my house is on fire ! - We're the firemen.

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Justin Beiber

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What's the difference between Neil Armstrong and Michael Jackson? Neil Armstrong is an astronaut. Michael Jackson abuses little kids.

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Did you hear about the alter boy that wasn't molested by a priest?

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What happened when the chicken crossed the road? I got feathers stuck in my cars grill

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What's purple and smells like crap? Crap. I lied about the purple

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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