A Blonde, a brunette, and a redhead where hiding from the police They were all shot and all died because they were playing Grand Theft Auto 5

hahah there are so funny that they are so funny that they are so litteral that i make my self make other people laugh so that they poop

What is the difference between a jew and a pizza? Jews are people, and are a nation and ethnoreligious group originating in the Israelites or Hebrews of the Ancient Near East. A pizza on the other hand is an Italian dish made up of cheese, bread sauces and multiple toppings.

How did the little boy get down from the top of the empire state building... He took the elevator

Why didn't Helen Keller drive? With all that time she spent learning how to read and write despite being blind and deaf, authoring numerous books, and being a prolific political activist; she simply did not have the substantial time to acquire a driver's license.

Who is happpier than the grouch about the Zombie Apoclypse? Dora.

why did the ginger cross the road to go to hell

Your mother is so fat she sometimes eats a normal sized portion of food and does not feel satisfied

What happens if an unmovable object gets hit by an unstoppable force? To get to the other side.

What do you call a medical student who finishes last in his class? Doctor.

columbus laid an egg. he was very proud of it, but the other dudes ate it.

Why did little Johnny fall off his swing? He had no arms.

What do you call a man man with no arms and no legs floating in the ocean? Bob(he is bobbing in the water)

Why did the man go to sleep at 9:30? Because his mom told him to

What is black, white and red all over? Many things.

Spoiling your fun. Jesus said on the cross, I shall return. Then he returned three days later to say goodbye to his people. Moral: What the fuck are you Åsshats waiting for? The third coming?

why is your mother dead? because i killed him.

Knock Knock? whos there? The man at the door then finds himself thinking what his last name is as he lately got amnesia

I was looking out the window on a Sunday morning. The coffee was fresh, and the air was moist. I had recieved a phone call last night on the contents of a briefcase that was to be left on my front door today. The explination was vague, and I was told to enjoy my last day. Then I died.

roses are red violets suck dick i need a wee

How do you get a Black Person out of a tree? Well, if he is stuck call 911 itmediatly!

How do u know a black woman is pregnant? When she pulls out a tampon it has no cotton on it.

Why does Waldo wear stripes? Because Martin Handford drew him that way to make him unique and distinguishablefrom the hundreds of other drawn people (and animals) in the pages of the children's game book, which incidentally is known as Where's Wally in numerous non-USA countries.

How do you register on webkinz? You put a rope around a durable shower neck, & then hang yourself with it.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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