A chicken walks into a McDonald's and the cashier asked the chicken what he would like to order. A man waiting for his meal walked out realizing that the employees of this restaurant were not who he wanted making his food.

What do you call a baby with no future? A baby dying at birth.

Why did the little boy drop his ice cream? Because he was to busy watching porn. And then was hit by a truck.

Bill:What do you get when you cross a panda and an eagle? Joe:I don't know what? Bill: Is that even possible?

shut up iggy

Why was the boy hit by a bus? Because the driver is a homicidal sociopath.

What's green and fuzzy, and if it fell out of a tree it would kill you? A pool table.

You know what's really funny? Cancer What's funnier than that? The Holocaust Even funnier? Charlie Sheen

Guy 1: why are you such a douche? Guy 2: cause douches get the most p***y

why does jake have so many guns? hes compensating

A man goes to an amusement park. He heads straight for the roller-coaster and gets in line. When he gets to the front, the ride operator informs him that he is too short to ride. "You must be at least 48 inches, sir, you just barely miss the mark, I'm sorry, I can't let you ride." The man is sad, but he doesn't let this little discrepancy ruin his day. He then gets in line for a different ride.

What did the tomato say to the ketchup? Nothing both vegetables and condiments are inanimate objects, therefore cannot speak

They say those with anti-humour are the wisest.

What is big, red, and eats rocks? A big, red, rock eater!

What happens when you cross a kangaroo and an elephant? Absolutely nothing. The two belong to entirely different animal families and their reproductive abilities are totally incompatible. A kangaroo could never fertilize an elephant, or vice versa. To suggest anything else is unrealistic and a physical impossibility.

who should be competing in the paralympics? Brent the retard!

Your dads dead. lol

Why was Helen Keller a bad driver? Because she was blind and deaf which impairs the ability to register sights and sounds necessary to operate an automobile.

how long does it take a meth-head to rob your flat? not long at all, and they'll take everything. they need to, it's an addiction

why was 6 afraid of 7?

What did the T-rex say to the elephant? i like bananas

Im black

Hey, I'm Schrödinger, and this is crazy! But here's a sealed box... the cat lives, maybe...

What do you call a cow with no legs? A leg-less cow

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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