Mama Bear and Papa Bear were in court getting a divorce and the judge offered Baby Bear a choice of which parent to live with. "Do you want to live with your mother?" the judge asks. "No! She beats me." answers the baby bear. "OK, then you can live with your father." says the judge. "No! He beats me too!" cries baby bear. So Baby Bear was placed in a foster home.

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No, I do not have the will, I have a family now, I make a living writing fiction, and well, play a small role in keeping not national, but worldwide stability in such things as the economics. The thing is, that you are renegades, you do not break the law, but you like to do things your own way, that gets you enemies among the so called "paragons" in the face of society and media. Its just like back in the days, if CIA, The Feds, Interpol and such are known as the "Paragons of civilization" or "the good guys" if you prefer, they can point towards you guys, and say "these are evil", and then nothing can stop them.

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What do ghosts get whaen they watch porn ? a boner

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why was little bobby sad? he accidentally super-glued Jupiter to his forehead.

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Do you want to hear a joke? No. Women's- oh, okay.

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What did Helen Keller do when she found a dead body? Nothing.

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why did the man jump off the building? to commit suicide.

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Why did the Mexican choose the blue marker over the green one? Because he his favorite color was green, and it was Opposite Day.

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Why do fancy unicorns wear jackets? Because they're fancy.

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What does DNA stand for? National Dyslexic Assosiation.

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What's a pirate's favorite school subject? Pirate math.

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What's worse than Fantasy Basketball? Playing Fantasy WNBA.

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Why do Vampires Sparkle in the Sunlight? They don't read a proper Vampire Novel and see for yourself.

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whats red and bad for your teeth? A Brick

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Why did the kitchen cross the road?

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What did the Black guy, the Asian, and the White guy have in common? they were all brutally murdered.

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Whats your name? Bill. I have a son named Kevin.

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A kid walks into a ctholic school and asks about the therory of evolution.

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how do you make a mailman mad? you sleep with his wife

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Roses are red I have a phone,no texts me am forever alone~The Jokers

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A horse walked into a bar. The bartender asked, "Why the long face?" The horse did not reply because he was incapable of speech.

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what did the dirty homeless girl get for Christmas -A DILDO

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Why is the little boy so smart? He tries in school and hes asian

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why did the chicken cross the road? it was making its way home after a long day of luckless job interviews

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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