Your mama's so fat that she killed herself because she was so depressed about her weight.

Want to here a joke? The First Amendment.

Fred and DooDah go to their favorite lake to fish. After getting out on the water, DooDah hooks a huge fish, which pulls him overboard, and he drowns. Fred is brokenhearted and goes to tell DooDah's wife the news. She opens the door and hears Fred sing: "Guess who drowned in the lake today? DooDah! DooDah!"

why did the giraffe cross the road? because my dad and his "fishing buddies" are having another "meeting" in the basement. I hear weird noises, and I haven't seen my little sister in weeks, since the last "meeting." Dad said she went to a special camp for little girls. I hear horrible noises.

What kind of jokes to dairy farmers tell? Corny jokes.

What happens when you park a new Cadillac with a roll of $100 dollar bills on the dashboard in a black neighborhod? Many residents of that peaceful community will briefly glance at it and admire the wealth of the automobile's owner.

Why dont jews eat pork? Because the torah doesnt allow cannibalism

WWII veteran screamed! "You damn yellow monkey" "But sir......my fur is brown!" Replied the monkey.

What do you call a woman with a black eye and several cuts on her face? The police and perhaps a social help hotline. She now feels safer and more secure and will go on to lead a happy life thanks to you speaking out on her behalf.

What kind of car does Yoda drive? Nothing, Yoda doesn't exist.

Jim just got laid off at the office. He believes his life is going to hell, so he commits suicide. His wife then later was blamed for his death because they were having many arguments. She was sentenced to life and slowly rotted in prison for the rest of her life. Their children then are moved around from foster home to foster home and they grow up to be drug dealers.

Want to hear a joke? Me neither.

How do you kill a retard You give em a kinfe and ask who's special

What's the difference between an orange and a dead baby? One is a popular citrus fruit commonly grown in Florida, and the other is a horrible tragedy, possibly caused by miscarriage or a serial killer, who was hopefully immediately jailed for his actions.

Guess what.. chicken butt

What is a cow's favorite drink? Well, I could be wrong and this is just my opinion, but I do not believe that animals experience feelings and, in corollary, favoritism towards anything, particularly regarding basic survival needs, such as hydration.

what did the boy with no arms and legs get for his birthday just dance 3

Why did the squirl eat the accorn? Because he enjoys it.

im gonna sue mcdonalds i asked for a hamburger and it was a beef burger -_-

A very rich man had a daughter whom all of the men in town wanted to marry her for wealth. Except there was one man who wanted to marry her due to his love for her. The father let his daughter marry whomever she wanted from all of the men in town, and she chose a man named Wilson Fremblington who wanted to marry her for wealth, because he was physically fit and overall a friendly man.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it felt like it!!!

What has two arms and two legs? A human being.

A woman walks into a bar. She is pregnant and gives her baby fetal alcohol syndrome.

John: Do you like Cake? Sue: Yes. John: Alright.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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