- Anti Joke

Why don't women need watches? Because they probably have a cell phone, which works just as well.

What's worse than stubbing your toe? Dyeing of cancer.

Why is a banana yellow? I don't know, ask a scientist, stupid

Penis

what did the black guy say to his friend who was on acid? man you trippin.

What did the blind and deaf kid get for Christmas? Leukemia.

What do you call women playing the sport of lacrosse? I dont think it matters because Women's Lacrosse isn't a sport.

womens rights to vote

what did batman say to robin before they got into the batmibile "get in the batmoblie"

There are two hippos in a bathtub, one says to the other, "pass the soap." the other hippo says, "no soap, radio."

Duh, its red not ginger, like really really red... Not unlike my eyes, which is a bit of the reason I dye it., I also use colored contact lenses most of the time now.

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple finding half a worm in your apple.

A fifteen-year-old walks into a bar. He is told to leave by the tender because of his obvious prepubescent appearance, deeming him far from the legal age of drinking.

What did America get on the 11th September? 9/11

A: How much do you love me? B: Count the stars in the sky and you'll know. A: But, it's morning. B: Exactly.

What do you call a black man who has become a millionare? A financhaly successful buisnessman who worked hard to be where he is today.

A girl asked a guy if he thought she was pretty, He said 'No'. She asked him if he would want to be with her forever. He said 'no'. She then asked him if she were to leave would he cry, Once again, he replied 'no'. She had heard enough. As she walked away, tears streaming down her face the boy grabbed her arm and said.. 'Asking emotionally charged hypothetical questions that are completely irrelevant to the prior conversation is known as fishing for compliments. Except, your tears seem to reflect a more serious inner emotional neediness. I suggest you seek a psychologist.'

Pff, "Axel", you are a fucking amateur, I can convey your fucking message in two lines, and one and a half of those lines would be fucking swearing and insults. I am done with the fucking underground society, it used to be a great place for people to discuss real world matters rather than be blinded by the fucking lies of the media, and yes religion, if you ever worked for me, you know that the fucking bible is a textbook example of every goddamn brain washing technique there is. But if you where ever my allumni, id expect you to use those methods sparringly and only when neccesary. No wonder people consider you a fucking cultist, you use your fucking methods as smoke and mirrors rather than letting "your people" know, and teach them that you just use a bunch of verbal tricks. Mental-ism is not magic, and neither should it be implied to be part of the surreal, while I respect your ideology, you have misused it to acquire power and wealth from those you claim to protect, and while you do convey some good ideals, you are far too arrogant and ignorant for the role you have given yourself. Besides, even if you could protect "your people" as you claim you can, who the fuck is supposed to protect the rest from them?! That is some hard core methods you are abusing "Axel", and you know it, if you claim to be anti religion, then stop using the very same methods they do without teaching people how the methods work first! Moral: Never underestimate me, I enjoy behaving like a jackass, but it does not mean that I am one, as for you, you are a jackass which likes behaving like someone worthy of respect. I am still at the fucking hospital, so if you want some guidelines, speak here, and if you cant send me your contact information so we can chat on a proper phone, I will only have to assume that you are either a coward for not revealing your location to an obviously superior man ...Or... ...that... ...you... Are a fucking coward little bitch that simply keeps on hiding behind the people he claims to protect and shield! Start by admitting that I am far beyond your puny knowledge, and I might throw in a few lines of assistance. Moral 2: You are fucking using horse head network as we speak! I use it for bullshit and "iron manning", you shame the remains of the underground society for using it as means of "encoded messages" and at all!

A cup of ranch walks into a lemon

Why did the school bus crash? The driver was a loaf of bread.

Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know. Chickens like to wander around.

why are black people so good at basketball? because they all can run jump steal and shoot

Your Mama is so fat, when she jumped on the couch, she broke the couch.

who do hannah morgan and bonnie do in their free time? ANTI JOKEZ

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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