A man made a sandwich.

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what is long and bare? polonaise to the pediatric ward what is short and bald? same polonaise, 3 weeks later

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Why is Santa fat? Because the apples are red.

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Why did the mentally handicapped kid fail his math test? Because he didn't study.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it can do whatever the hell it wants

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Roses are red That much is true But violets are purple Not freaking blue

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A girl walks out of a bar then gets raped.

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Why did the jew die Really...

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the best time to wear a striped sweater is all the time

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A blonde, a brunette, and a red-head are trapped on a desert island together After many days without food, they resort to cannibalism. The blonde eats the brunette, and the red-head eats the blonde. The red-head eventually dies once the water supply runs out.

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Roses are red violets are blue, he is for me and not for you, he's too ugly you can have him

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Why was the little girl blowing bubbles in the swimming pool? Because she was drowning

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What is red and bad for your teeth? A brick

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Why are elephants gray? So you don't get them confused with blueberries.

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What do you call a clock with no hands? Broken.

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What's worse than being the last man on earth with thousands of women to please? Realizing that you are gay and there are no men left.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Roses can also be white And violets can also be purple

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How do you kill Chuck Norris? Short Answer: You can't.

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i cant think of one.

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On a scale of 1 to drunk how ten are you?

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How much carlins does it take to screw in a light bulb? One

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What do you call a black guy flying an airplane? A pilot, you f***ing racist.

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Why did the man get a haircut? Because he had long hair.

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I just met you! And this is crazy! I just took bath salts, and yor face looks tasty!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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