What time is it? Ask chuck Norris! Gosh!!

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Why cant you find your handle? Because YOU CANT HANDLE THE TRUTH!

thumb_up thumb_down +17

What do you get when you cross a Kangaroo with a sheep? A: That would be impossible for it is impossible to breed a kangaroo and a sheep due to their difference in genetic material and number of chromosomes

thumb_up thumb_down +17

It was nice knowing you Erron, it really was.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

What's so good about being Swiss? Well.... The flag's a big plus

thumb_up thumb_down +17

bill: HEY! your moma so fat bob:so i dont care shes gonna die soon anyway

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Two trains, each having a speed of 30km/h, are headed at each other on the same straight track. A bird that can fly 60km/h flies off the front of one train when they are 60km apart and heads directly for the other train. After reaching the other train, the bird flies directly back to the first train, and so forth. What is the total distance the bird travels before the train collide? Who cares about the bird if two trains are going to collide? You need to call this in immediately.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Coffee just isn't his cup of tea.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Your in a building there's no windows ,doors and a sement floors and u only have a mirror and a table how do you get out You look in the mirror see what u saw take the saw saw the table in half two halfs make a hole clime out the hole

thumb_up thumb_down +17

a rabbi,a priest and minister didn't walk into a bar. Bars are for fun and fun is for not completely insane brainwashed people.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Knock Knock! Come in.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

*you're

thumb_up thumb_down +15

What's black and white and red all over? A mime that got hit by a train

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Why did the chicken cross the road? Well, it was kind of by chance that it crossed the road and what is the big deal lots of animals cross the road. For example possums, squirrels, deer, raccoons, cats, dogs, rabbits do pretty often too it's weird because sometimes more rabbits cross the road on Easter I don't know if that's just me though, chipmunks, bears, over in Africa probably tigers and lions cross those roads.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

What did the gun say to the pencil? Draw

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Why does Michael J. Fox make the best milkshakes? Because he uses only the finest ingedients.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

feces

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Why do babies cry on airplanes? Because gay people are getting married.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Your mom's so hairy, she should go to the barber!

thumb_up thumb_down +15

How many testicles did Adolph Hitler have? Two.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

What's the same between a plane a bird and a piece of celery? They all fly except the celery

thumb_up thumb_down +15

What's gay, has ten eyes and is gay. One D. Kelvin Yang.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

How do stop a clown from laughing? Hit in the face with a hatchet.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

"Knock Knock" "Who's there?" "God" "Then come right in!"

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops