Whats the difference between a Ferrari and a pile of dead babies? I dont have a Ferrari in my garage.

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What do u call two mexicans playing basketball? Juan on Juan!

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A-S-S-H-O-L-E!!!! Everybody A-S-S-H-O-L-E!!!!

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Why did the koala bear fall outta the tree? He died. Why did the second koala fall out of the tree?? He was stapled to the first koala. Why did the third koala fall out of the tree?? He had no arms. Why did the fourth koala fall out of the tree?? He thought it was a race to the bottom. Why did the fifth koala fall out of the tree?? Peer Pressure.

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What's the square root of 69? 8.3

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Who is a knob? ross d

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Why did the terrorist miss the flight he was supposed to blow up? He forgot his passport.

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What did the man say when he lost all his hair? Man: My life has been getting worse and worse ever since I developed cancer.

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What's brown and green and if it falls out of a tree on top of you, it will kill you? A pool table

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What do you call a clock with no hands? Broken.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Not having enough money to buy an apple.

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How do you kill half the population of Mexico? A preemptive nuclear strike.

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Roses are red Violets are red Shit My garden's on fire?

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womens rights

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U ALL LIAK DIK

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0 + 0 = 0

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to your house. Nock Nock. Whose there? The chicken.

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How do you drown a blond? Glue a mirror to the bottom of a pool!

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Roses are red, violets are blue ive got a gun so get in the van!

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I'm so hot my father calls me son.

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OY SHIT ITS YOUR MOM!!!

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A homosexual black man and a 13 year old child are in the shower at the local gym. The black man says to the boy "you dropped your soap, why don't you pick it up?" The boy promptly thanks the black man, picks up his soap and continues to shower.

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Mindfuck: They call you a patient where medics are because they do not want you to become impatient. The Coronel is the Kernel of the army (coronel sounds a lot like coronel no?) Sergeant = Sir gent. as in Sir gentle(man) Ok, so if you experience insanity one day, does that make you insane forever? In that case I was born and will die hungry and thirsty. Sigmund Freud= Sickman fraud. General: The guy you should generally listen to if you are in the army. 3.14 ratebay = PIRATE BAY! Why is Satan the antichrist, humans killed him :P Satan only "tempted his thirsty brother with water at the desert" Jesus showed real power by saying "NO WATER WHEN I AM THIRSTY IS BAD FROM MY BROTHER!"

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Knock, Knock. Who's there? Milkman. Milkman who? I've been coming here for 14 years and you don't even know my name? I helped take your mother to the hospital for crying out loud! I held you in my arms as a baby! And you don't even have the decency to remember MY NAME?! I'm sorry I don't live in a house that allows milk and other groceries to be delivered, I'm sorry that I wasn't born into a nice family with a nice home! I'm sorry that I have had to come here EVERY WEEK FOR FOURTEEN YEARS and you can't even remember my NAME! My name! I left my family for christmas one year to go pick up that elmo doll for you when you were a kid! I saved you from that burning treehouse! I helped you with you're 3rd grade science fair project and you won! YOU WON! We took a picture together that i have kept in my wallet. And i proudly say here's me and timmy. ME AND TIMMY! TIMMY! But no...you don't need to know my name. Well good day sir. You shan't see me again.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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