What did the boy with no arms or legs get for christmas? Shoes

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What is worse than finding a worm in an apple? The Holocaust

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I Used to be an Adventurer like you, Then I retired to achieve the top Anti-Joke.

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Knock knock Who's there? A very long space I see what you did there

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How much wood would a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? Well that, my friend, is a good question.

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A legless and armless woman is laying on the beach. A man walks by and hears her crying. "What's wrong?" asks the man. "I've never been kissed before" says the woman. So the man leans down and kisses her. The next day the man sees the woman crying at the beach again. "What's wrong this time?" asks the man. "I've never been hugged before" So the man picks up the legless and armless woman and gives her a big hug. The next day the man sees the woman still on the beach crying. "Okay now what's wrong?" asks the man. "I've never been f---ked before" says the woman. So the man picks up the woman, and has sex with her. They end up going on several dates later on and getting married at sunset on the very beach where they met.

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An Antihumorous Story Part One A rich man named Richard told his son James that he could have anything in the world for his thirteenth birthday. James only asked for one thing: a silver box containing 542 pink ping pong balls. So Richard gave him a metal box containing 542 pink ping pong balls. Five years later, Richard heard a strange noise coming from James' room. It was the sound of a machine whirring, then a high pitched scream. All of a sudden, James bursted out of his room and ran out of the house. Later, the boy could not recall the incident. It was completely erased from his memory. For his eighteenth birthday, James asked for a golden box containing 785 pink ping balls. So it was granted him. For the next ten years, Richard kept a careful eye on his son. Every night, James could be heard whispering madly, "It's almost ready," over and over. For his twenty-eighth birthday, James asked for a simple wooden box that had one million pink ping pong balls inside. "What do you need all those pink ping pong balls for?" Richard finally asked. James froze, fiddling with something in the pocket of his jacket. "Oh yes, that. They were necessary for--" Then he got hit by a bus.

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A pussy walks into a bar and orders a drink, the bar keeper asks " why are you such a pussy!" The pussy then says, "it's not my fault I'm a cat!" before getting run over

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Q:what did a keppy kid with a big nose say A:hi im josh Roberts

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. It was a dead monkey.

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why do you care?

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There once was a man from Peru, who dreamed he swallowed his shoe. But it turns out his dream was real, and he died because he could not digest a whole shoe.

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What's the difference between a duck

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Whats the worst thing about seeing a truck being snapped in half? It was mine

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Why did the boy laugh? Mr Tickle was his babysitter

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whats the difference between jimmy saville and a horse? jimmy has a bigger cock

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What did the kid with no arms, no legs, and cancer get for his birthday? A: Polio.

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There's a bunch of people standing around a retard...why is no one laughing? Its his funeral

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BBC have a new porn channel. C Boobies...

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What does rainbow stand for? Rick Astley Is Nesting By Our Window to harass us

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my friend is gay hes gay

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What do you call a black man yelling into a crowd? a preacher

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How many blacks does it take to screw in a light bulb? blacks don't work

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how many jews can you fit in a buick? six if you squeeze 4 in the back

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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