What did Santa get for a young boy? A gun.

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Whats worse than 12 babys stapled to a tree? 1 baby stapled to 12 trees!

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Two men walk into a bar. The third man ducks.

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Your mother is so old that her prom theme was fire

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What did the white guy said to the black guy, when he stepped on his foot? Excuse me.

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what is a jews favorite holiday? the halocaust.

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How many penises is one metric butt-load. Oh God I hope you don't know the answer.

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Whats worse than 911..? The plane ride there.

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What happens to a warehouse on a full moon? Nothing

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What has 8 legs , 6 eyes and 3 mouths ? - A cowboy riding a horse while holding a chicken .

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Roses are red, Violet are violet, not blue, dumbass.

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A white police officer pulled over a black guy on the highway. The cop asked him for license and registration. The black guy had a tail light out, and was very polite and cooperative. The two became close friends, but then one night, the black guy went to the house of the white cop. The black guy brought his wife and daughter over for a dinner party, eating grilled turkey sandwiches with mayonnaise. When the cop's attractive wife asked the black guy if he would like some fresh watermelon from the patch in their back yard, he respectfully declined, for he needed to return to his own home to patiently wait for a business call from one of his employees, who was also a very intelligent and hard working African male. Once home, the black guy turned on his stereo, to listen to some calming country music at an appropriately low level of volume, as his daughter and wife had gone to sleep, for the wife also had work in the morning, at her law firm, and her daughter had a job interview after her day of classes at Dartmouth were out for the day... then Martin Luther King Jr. woke up from his dream, and was soon thereafter assassinated.

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mc hammers income.

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What happens when you stab yourself in the heart? You die.

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A giant watermelon falls on a man He's dead

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What do you get when you mix a dog with speeding bus? Nothing, you can't mix those two things.

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Why did Lady Gaga arrive at the Grammy's in an egg? Because she was born that way.

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Your mom is so fat that she has to wear large clothing.

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An Englishman, an Irishman and a Scotsman walk into a bar. They had just been to their father's funeral, who was a Welshman.

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What do you call a black priest? Father

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What's black and hangs from a tree? A tire swing.

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An Irishman walks out of a bar...

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Whats red and eats like dog? A fox.

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What's the difference between a girlfriend and a wife? You aren't married to a girlfriend.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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