- Anti Joke

What does a plum and a rabbit have in common? A: they're both purple, except for the rabbit!

" Hey you have something on your face. " ( man speaking punches the guy he was talking to ) " It was pain."

What do you call a black man standing on top of a church? bullshit!!

1. A woman gets on a bus with her baby. The bus driver says: ''Ugh, that's the ugliest baby I've ever seen!'' The woman walks to the rear of the bus and sits down, fuming. She says to a man next to her: ''The driver just insulted me!'' The man says: ''You go up there and tell him off. Go on, I'll hold your monkey for you.''

What's black and white and red all over? A penguin in a blender.

George: I see you got a haircut. Jim: No, I got them all cut.

A: Knock, Knock! B: Who's there? A: Boo B: Boo, who? A: Don't cry, it's only me!

What do Jews, Muslims and Blacks have in common? They are all valuable members of the community and should be treated no differently from anyone else

since when?

Wanna hear an oxymoron? Jews for Jesus.

why the woman scream when she arrived at her surprise party? Everyone was dead!

Roses are Violets, Violets are Roses, I am a dumb ass, The Hobbit.

What do u call it when a Jamaican gets angrey? Nothing, at all. Just an angrey person

What did the American say to the Russian? Hello, but the Russian did not understand

What's the difference between a lawyer and a shark? One is a person and one is a fish. Other than that, not much at all.

Why did the Jew die? Because Hitler was born...

Roses are red, But ravens are black, please go to China, and never come back!

What's big, brown, and barks? Tree

Lisa’ house needed to be painted and her brother offered to do it for her. Lisa thought it was a nice gesture and told him that she wanted the house in antique white. However; after painting the house, Lisa noticed that her brother had used a color with a dark yellow tone. ”Are you sure this is Antique white?” she asked him. ”Offcourse!” he said. Afraid of hurting his feelings, Lisa didn’t dare to say anything. Ten years later, the house needed to be painted again. This time Lisa wanted to hire a professional painter, but her brother insisted on doing for her. He brought the paint, which Lisa recognized as the same yellow paint, with a color that Lisa had really begun to hate. ”Brother, are you sure this is antique white?” she asked, forcing a seriousness in her voice. ”Offcourse!” he answered, and Lisa was still too embarressed to object. Her brother didn’t have an easy life and she didn’t want to break his confidence. So the house was painted, same as before. Lisa did however notice a strange light in her brothers eyes. Another ten years passed, and the house needed to be painted a third time. This time however Lisa had had enough. Though it was her brother, she had become increasingly ashamed of her house had even stopped having guests over. With a deep breath she picked up the phone and called up her brother, ready to confront him. A woman answered; it was his wife. She could hardly speak because of her sobbing. Unfortunately Lisa’s brother had been killed in a car accident earlier that day.

An indian boy gets a girlfriend

This is "Eliza" holy shit! I almost gave up and went to a party assuming you guys had simply skipped the reply. Please tell me nothing of this is written in code, because I have no fucking idea how to decipher it... ...To think that so few consider Nero a hero for all that he has done, and so many have come to hate him and still follow his advice basically abusing him. I told my sister to use mom`s cellphone to call and warn as many as possible, telling them to spread the word, is Nero7 Going to make it? He mentioned a barfight starting over nothing during new years eve. I know that some of the members where planning to use his own teachings in order to overthrow him, I warned him but he was fully aware already but did nothing for some reason. Yet none of them have the assets to do anything like this... Should I start calling all those members that left during Nero7`s "sudden paranoia period?" Many of them have political authority and can be of help if we can somehow convince them. Respond Asap, and if Nero7 is in a public hospital, then get him the hell out of there, he is an exposed target for anyone, if he gets killed, ill fucking kill you you hear me!

That moment when you try and finger your girlfriend and there no hole......and you start questioning your sexuality

The white supremisist woman with anxiety dialed the suicied help hot line. The operator that answered was clearly African-American. She then hung up the phone and continued to call back and try again.

How do you find Will Smith in a snowstorm? You look for the black guy.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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