emma: how will we survive zombies? mat t: just give me a blow job ......4 seconds later emma: so what now?

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what do you call a black man in prison? justice.

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Whats funnier than 24? Adam Sandler.

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Why was Hellen Kellers leg yellow? Because her dog was blind too.

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What do you call a toddler with a gun? Interesting

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How do you push a blond off a cliff? Push here.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have clamidia Because Polly shat on me.

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What the corn in the core? The mexican antelope.

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Knock knock Who's there? Death. Come with me.

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What's worse then being HIV positive? Catching the cold the next day.

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Do you know what big feet mean. Big socks

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Proof reading

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why did the nazi eat the jew? He didn't

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GEORGE LOPEZ SUCKS

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A man walks into a doctors office. The doctor says "I've got good news and bad news. Which do you want first?" The man responds "Let's hear the good news." The doctor says "I ran a series of tests and found you have leukemia, but your insurance paid for everything." Shocked, the man asks "What's the bad news?" The doctor answers "Your company is switching to a private insurer and because of your pre-existing condition you've been denied coverage. None of your future treatments will be covered."

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Justin Beiber

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Swiggity Swooty. I'm currently in pursuit for that part of your body people refer to as "booty".

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Why did the toast land butter side down. The devil visited earth that day and therefore everything that could go wrong did.

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Don't you spell Pewdiepies name like "Pewdipie" than Pew-die-pie? Like who wants to kill a pie?

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Your mom’s so dumb she forgot to update her WordPress installation and now she has pharmaceutical links all over her page.

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Why are they the "living" daylights?

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Good boy

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Roses are black Violets are black I'm blind

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Girls Basketball.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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