a man i knew who was a real jerk was about to drive home drunk. i was trying to stop him, but then he punched me in the face. i let him through. he died that night. i texted him all the way

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I watched The Pianist last night? Holocaust

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Why was the boy crying last night? - a clown raped him

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Why can't Helen Keller drive a car? Because she's dead.

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Hi

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I am awesome, you are not, i am awesome, you smoke pot!

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A deaf, mute clown wearing nothing but a dead cat, a rainbow wig, and his own feces breaks into a couples home on April fools day. Then he murders them both because he is an escaped patient from an asylum for the criminally insane.

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space is fun

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Q: If it takes a chicken a day and a half to lay an egg and a half, then how long would it take a monkey to kick the seeds off of a dill pickle. A: I don't know. That's a stupid question.

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Person 1: I have one question: What are those?!?!?!?!?! Person 2 : Their shoes you Dimwit. Person 1: (runs away crying) -by Mekkhi

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I've got a big dick, Now suck it you fucking bitch!

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What's brown and sticky? Shit

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Yo momma so fat She has heart problems

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What did the Jew say to the other Jew? Found a penny the other day....

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why did the chicken cross the road? because he was peckish.

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Q: What did Delaware? A: A black dress. She was on her way to her father's funeral.

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What did one black guy say to the other black guy? I haven't thought of it yet....

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Why was Adolf Hitler such a bad man? Because he never kissed his wife goodbye.

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what does a pickle and a computer have in common? ... they both have a mouse.

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A woman is home washing her dishes when she suddenly slips banging her head on a cabinet. She passed out for a few seconds, then woke to find a great gash on her left cheek, fairly spurting blood. At the emergency room, the doctor asks, "How did this happen?" The woman replied, "My boy friend tried to drown me."

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Want to hear a joke about my penis? Nevermind it's too long.

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What do you get when you cross a Mexican, a black guy and an octopus? I don't know but I don't like it.

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Knock, knock (No one was home)

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boy1: whats blue and goes blub blub? boy2:i dont know boy1:a blue blub blub boy1: whats green and goes blub blub? boy2:a green blub blub boy1:no. there is no such thing called a green blub blub

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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