a chinese man and an irishman walk into a bar. This is odd because these men are from countries extremely far apart from one another

You're in a room with your friend, and you see some one being eaten by a monster. Who's getting eaten? No one, monsters aren't real.

What do you call a guy with no arms and no legs sitting on a bench? Nothing. Why would you harrass a guy with no arms and no legs.

What's the difference between an apple and an orange? 87

Two 50 year old men walk into eachother on the street. one was born in a hobo shack and another was born in a mansion. what did the rich one say to the poor one? Hi, whats your name?

women outside of the kitchen

What did George Washington say to his men before they crossed the Delaware? Get in the boat.

Q:What did I get for Christmas? A:You, put on this leash.

Your mother's breasts sag with such severity that the late, great surrealist artist Salvatore Dali mistook them for clocks.

How many Amish people does it take to change a light bulb? None because they don't believe in technology.

Knock Knock Get off my property or I'll call the cops on you!- Napoleon Dynamite

A- Knock Knock B- Who's there? A- Soccer!

What do you say the big head boy? Brush yo teeth

What's black and white and red all over? A mime that got hit by a train

A Boy went up to his dad and told him he was hungry. His dad then beat him to death.

How many Mexicans does it take to change a lightbulb? Probably just one.

That moment when you touch your balls then sniff your fingers and realize it smells good.

What do you call a mouse that sings? Justin Bieber

Knock knock. Who's there? It's the police. Your father's been taken to county jail for his third DUI.

sarah taylor

Women's Rights.

Whats blue and flies? A suffocating baby strapped to a fan.

I saw a mexican drowning and saved him... as my screensaver ;)

Clement: Hey love. Want to go out on a date? Patience: No. Clement: That's all right. Your agreement is not needed. *Clement ties up Patience's hands and feet, gags her and puts her in the back of his meat delivery van. He is planning to throw her into the sewers.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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