The neighbours challenged me to a water fight so I am updating Anti jokes while i let the kettle boil.

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A dog walked into the forest and saw a whale in a puddle

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Abe Lincoln, George Washington, George Bush and Barack Obama are sitting at a table at a bar. They all realize that none of them know each other, wonder when in time they are, have mental breakdowns, and run screaming into the night.

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Why doesn't Bella like airplanes? Because her family crashed in one....

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Roses Are Red Violets Are Blue A Face Like Yours Belongs In The ZOO. :o

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emma: how will we survive zombies? mat t: just give me a blow job ......4 seconds later emma: so what now?

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why do i want to get raped because then its not rape

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'Knock knock' 'who's there?' 'Whinny the poo' 'Whinny the poo who?' 'Whinny the poo'

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why was the girl sleeping on the ground? because she was dead

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A grasshopper walks into into a bar and the bartender says, "We have a drink named after you. But me telling you this is in no way productive because insects cannot understand human language."

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What happened when the white man saw a black man running with a purse? He called the police. The police proceeded to chase the black man down tackling him into a dumpster, causing permanent spinal damage. Upon investigation into the situation, the black man was deaf and he was bringing the purse, which contained an epi-pen, to his dying wife a block away. The white man who called the police and the police officers involved were sued by the family for a large sum of money.

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"I like my women like I like my spare tires, in the trunk of my car." -Paul Alangadan

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What do you call a person with a big ass head? A person with a big ass head

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What does the scarecrow from the wizard of oz and a zombie have in common? They both want brains.

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Penis

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A man runs into a bar. He is instantly knocked out.

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Why was the guy shot? He was a soldier in World War 2. Lots of people were shot.

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As if it helps your self esteem: Nothing yet, Be the first to comment.

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Why did Tommy get a wedgie? He was gay, and his parens were dead, so the school bully,decided to wedge his underwear up his butt.

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The French guy and the Italian guy got in the bar at the same time, but they didn't talk as they didn't know each other.

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a black guy and a hispanic are in a car. Whos driveing? The bvlack guys mom, picking them up from a church class, and takeing them to volunteer a the local homeless shelter.

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why did the chicken cross the road? To prove to the possum it can be done.

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What do you get when you have sex with a $10 prostitute? Nothing, she's clean. She may be low-scale, but she'll be damned if she's not careful.

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what did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where's my tractor?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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