Q. What happened when a mouse ran up the clock and it struck 12? A. It fell off and got raped by an 80 year old Asian lady with breast cancer

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A man finds a lamp on the beach so decides to rub it. Nothing happens.

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A Japanese man walks into a bar, it collapses and then is demolished by a tsunami.

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A black man sits down to have a legal conversation with his state appointed attorney for the first time being arrested. They lawyer advises him to tell him the truth of exactly what happened. He proceeds to do so and is provided with excellent legal advice.

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hot diggity dog

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yo mama so fat that the doctor asked for her weight not her phone number!

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Knock Knock. Come in.

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what do lions and potatoes have in common? They each drive a sports car, wait neither the lion nor the potato drive a sports car. Sorry to waste your time with this joke that seemed to not really have a meaning or a clever punchline.

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How do you make a bllind person cry? Slowly cut off their toes.

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Person One: Three bears are eating tacos, seventeen bears are making margaritas, how many bears are going to the supermarket to get overly prices expired two percent milk? Person Two: ...Who gives a shit!!!!!!!!?!?!?!?!!!? Person One: No! That is incorrect!..................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................its 16

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Why did jimmy fall of his bike? Because jimmy was a goldfish

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? The Holocaust. No, the Holocaust never happened, you're an idiot.

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What's better than sex? Nothing

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Who can you NOT apply the term "Gentle Giant" to? Dwarfs.

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You want to hear a joke? Democract

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Why is the black guy bad a Hockey? He was raped with a hockey stick by his father, after many years of pain and sex jokes, and the internet meme of the rapey daddy came out, the man then tryed to kill him self, but lived and the became a... shit i forgot, well long story short, it was roger from family guy.

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Why was the little boy sad? Because he had a frog stapled to his face.

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Goats are like mushrooms. If you shoot a duck, I'm scared of toasters

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What time is it when an elephant sits on your car? 12:00

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she was born with the disorders of being blind and deaf. For any human, having blindness and deafness makes driving a near impossible task.

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knock knock 'who's there?' 'just open the door'

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- Ask me if I'm a firetruck. - Are you a firetruck? - No.

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Why was Timmy dirty? Because he was buried

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Have you ever tried ethiopian food? No. Neither have they

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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