Why did the man walk up to a bank teller with a gun? He is the security guard; he wanted to ask her for financial advice.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

A grandma says come on twinkies and the teinkies say were terriosts from your lost hole

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Why did Sara fall off the swings? She had no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Sara.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Up until today I thought eminem was the lead singer for maroon 5

thumb_up thumb_down -8

So once upon a midnight dreery.... In a galaxy far far away that takes place in the past but resembles a technologically advanced future, an evil sith overlord took an innocent Jedi knight and turned him in a cybernetic killing machine. In the end, he dies

thumb_up thumb_down -8

i wonder who made this website? a human

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Why did the car cross the road? Isn't that what cars do?

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 is a registered sex offender.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Robin, get in the car, please.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Why was the blonde confused? Because someone was dressed in a chicken costume throwing pinecones at her.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What does an elephant and a plum have in common? They are both purple... except for the elephant

thumb_up thumb_down -8

why did the dog cross the street? because it saw a squirrel

thumb_up thumb_down -10

what do you say when your phone is broken? A: my phone is broken

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Eric went for a poo in the public toilets. After he finished, he realised that there was no toilet roll. So he had to just pull up his pants and put up with his sshitty arse for the rest of the day. Unfortunately, he was in a board meeting and when he went in he stank of shit and it was a very uncomfortable feeling.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

why did the girl like dick? Because Dick was a nice boy.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

What did Juliet tell Romeo before they kissed? Kiss me Romeo

thumb_up thumb_down -10

How many amish people does it take to screw in a light blub? None as the amish don't require artificial light

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Rarity: "So, what is that splendid frock of yours saying?" Maud Pie: "It doesn't talk. It's a dress."

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Q: what's wrong with this sentence? My dogs is running in the garden A: I don't have a garden

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? -death -kidney failure -gall stones -getting in an automobile accident -getting struck by lightning -getting sodomized -embezzlement -deception -HIV/AIDS -illness of any nature -world hunger -the holocaust -Zimbabwe's economy -getting hit by a train -getting hit by a bus -the hives -getting bit by an alligator -head injuries -being arrested -childhood obesity -sexual predators -highly impoverished areas -losing a finger -getting hit with a bat -corruption -general rudeness -being lost in the woods -contracting a sexually transmitted virus -teen pregnancy -murder -rape -robbery -going blind -losing a child -falling down a well -bestiality -identity fraud -massacres -racism -genocide -mental disabilities in children -bullying -food poisoning -stepping on a nail -eugenics -the mass murder, rape, and theft of the land from the Native people of America -forced assimilation -slavery -brain deteriorating illness -matricide -prostitution - accidentally repeating yourself -prostitution -domestic violence -animal cruelty -pollution -deforestation -global warming -losing your life savings -still birth -oppressive leaders -physical conflicts -world wars and other military conflict -the situation in Rwanda -Inequality in treatment of women in middle eastern countries -auto theft -tax evasion -terrorism -being diagnosed with cancer -clinical depression -prostitution -finding two worms in your apple

thumb_up thumb_down -12

If your riding a jet ski and the wheels fall off Then how many pancakes does it take to Cover a dog house Purple because ice cream doesn't have Any bones

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Q - What is worse than a nerdy joke on anti-jokes with a lot of big words in it? A - Although I get scared when i see big words, the page long jokes are probably worse

thumb_up thumb_down -12

How do you get clean dishes? You wash them.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops