- Anti Joke

Relax, it simply would not be working out for you if your mother was nearby, you see, the subconcious is limited by the concious mind, so if your subconcious can detect your mother (or anyone but me nearby) your conscious mind goes "uh oh" and it stops. Oh, right, and considering you can still type, how about we increase the effect into... I dunno, six billion? Yeah six billion. Anyway, the next time you want to experience it, just poke your nose, and since we do not want you to poke your nose off, you only do it once and you can yourself decide when it ends, at this level you should not be able to type, but if you want to type you can of course turn it off.

A pirate walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Hey, did you know you have a steering wheel down your pants?" The pirate replies, "Arrrgh, there's been a horrible nautical accident. Please call an ambulance immediately."

What's black and white and red all over? Michael Jackson after his operation.

What is green, has four legs, and if it falls out of a tree and onto your head, it will kill you? A pool table.

What's the difference between a pizza and a baby? I don't stab pizza 47 times in the chest with a chainsaw.

Knock Knock. Who's there? Charles. Charles who? It's your brother Charles. I came straight here from the doctor. I was just diagnosed with stage 4 testicular cancer.

what do you call a mexican with a rubber blanket cold

Doctor doctor, I feel like a pair of curtains!" "Never-mind that, you've got AIDS.

whats 2=2? gonorrhea.

What did the biker do when he heard about Kony 2012? He became a social activist and did his part by contributing to the cause.

What is the opposite of a joke ? Racism

What's louder than a cat stuck in a tree? A foghorn.

Q: Why did the plane crash? A: The driver was a loaf of bread

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Getting raped.

Charlie Sheen

why was six afraid of seven? because seven eight nine

Roses are red, violets are red, sunflowers are red, HOLY CRAP, MY GARDENS ON FIRE!

Why does Ray Charles always smile? Because he doesn't know he's black.

You dropped something.... Yo lip

What happened to the boy with cancer? He died.

Three Lawyers are walking, one falls down, gets up and continues walking

A rat and a pig rape a puppy. Hey, that's just life.

A man crawled up to a water fountain but fell because he had no legs

Bläeghen-Fassybìll-No?cheb!