Why are the deserts so dry? Obama

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How did the girl cross the road? -She didn't, she died because she was blind and didn't see the "don't walk" sign.

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Whats brown and sticky? Brown paint,

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Scientists have discovered that the state of your hunger can affect what you say. For example, whether you choose to say ‘I’m hungry,’ or, ‘I’m not hungry,’ is based upon how hungry you are.

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Have you heard the one about the blonde and the bear? No. Me neither.

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Why'd the guy fall off the building? I pushed him

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Why the guy without two hands at the beach was so excited? Because he couldn't scratch his asshole.

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knock knock who's there? Ah Maj. Ah Maj who? (say it outloud)

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Why can't Bin laden drive because he's dead

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Why did Justin Bieber jump out of the airplane? He didn't, i pushed him

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We could have had it all Rolling in the deep You have my heart inside of your hand As you've just now inexplicably ripped it out of my ribcage.

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If the camel has seven toes and the armadillo has thirteen, why does your mom pleasure herself to a picture of George Clooney ?

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Q: What would happen if Chuck Norris was hit by an Astroid A: He would die.

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"Did you fall from heaven?...Cause your face is really messed up."

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What does "Fiat" stand for? "Fabbrica Italiana Automobili Torino."

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Is your refrigerator running? Yes. Ok good, just checking. It would be a shame for your perishable foodstuffs to go bad.

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Knock Knock I have a door bell It's broken Oh

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If a tree falls on a deaf person, does anyone care?

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You always hear of the 9/11 stories where people who work in the World Trade Centers were late that day or home sick or whatever. My mom also worked there. It was a normal morning, got up to make us breakfast, got us to school on time, the whole bit. After having to do all that stuff, she actually got to work on time, and she died in the attack.

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Q: What's the biggest lie ever? A: Saying you read the Terms of Service

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What's white and can't climb trees? Yogurt

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It was commiting suicide.

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Why does everybody hates Justin Bieber? Just leave that girl alone!

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When life gives you lemons, Life isn't actually a person so saying that would be irrelevant

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops