Why didn't the man go to the movies?? Because he likes pie.

Three fish swim into a bar. The first one says "blub blub blub". The second one says "blub blub blub". The third one says "I'm not a fish I'm a human". What does the bartender say? Answer = Ayy Llmao _George_Bush_

Someone: I like my coffee like I like my men Someone else: Black? Someone: No, tied up, shoved in a burlap sack, and dragged through the mountains.

What do you call a black person that plays golf? Jack, his name is Jack.

Why didn't the black kid get anything for Christmas? His family was Jewish.

Why was Hellen Keller a bad driver? She was a woman

Why couldn't Hellen Keller drive? (Because she was blind and deaf?) No, because she was a woman.

what happens when you try to believe it's not butter? 34 Indonesian kids lose their job.

Did you hear about that anthony weiner guy. He is very depressed, and your mother has cancer.

what did the apple say to the orange? -- NOTHING! APPLES DO NOT TALK!

Someone dies every second. That's 60 a minute. 3600 a hour. 86,400 a day. 604,800 a week. 31,536,000 a year. But thankfully- I don't live in Zimbabwe.

What do you call a black man with a knife and red liquid on his hands? A chef who accidently spilled strawberry jam on himself.

Q: You know what never gets old? A: The kids in a school shooting

What happened to the girl who got an abortion? She got an infection.

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What's Worse Than Falling Over? .......Rape.

want more?

Q: Wanna hear a dirty joke? A: A kid fell in the mud.

Why did the goat cross the road. To put his sacrifices into the pentagram.

Which is worse, 9/11 or the holocaust? Biting into an apple and finding a worm.

Why did Suzie fall off the swing? Because she was hit by a refrigerator.

What's green and has wheels? Grass i was lying about the wheels.

What do you call a Mexican in the sand? A churro! (not trying to be racist, I'm even Mexican)

Roses are red, Violets are blue, The first line is spelled wrong, Ha, I tricked you

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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