What did George Washington say to his men before they got on a boat? Men, get on the boat

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Why is the Holocaust/Worm in your apple joke the highest rated joke on Anti Jokes? Most of the viewers of this website clicked on a thumbs up symbol directly below the joke, which by the coding of this website triggered an algorithm that caused the number adjacent to this thumbs up button to increase and also caused the joke to appear higher on the list of most popular jokes.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

why didn't the donkey go to the party? Because, unfortunately he did not have the required linguistic skills to communicate with the person inviting. This is obviously dependent on whether the person who invited him was a human, if it was another donkey then perhaps this would of happened. However, this is also very unlikely as donkeys do not have parties or really communicate

thumb_up thumb_down +2

I was wondering why the ball was getting bigger. Then I got stabbed.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What do you call a man running around town with no clothes on? Naked.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Tommy was excited to get a tattoo of a falafel on his wiener. He got skin cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What is red and smells like brown feces? Bloody feces

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Q: What's the hardest part about eating a vegetable? A: The wheel chair.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What's louder than a cat stuck in a tree? A foghorn.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Why did the boy fall off his bike? He was mauled by a bear!

thumb_up thumb_down

Whats worse than the holocaust? Sex with helen keller.

thumb_up thumb_down

What happens when u mix water and soda? You get watery soda

thumb_up thumb_down

How do you acquire a bomb? Go to the bomb store.

thumb_up thumb_down

What did the furry tweet when he went to a furry convention? A: I'm at a furry convention

thumb_up thumb_down

What's worse than Twilight? New Moon. What's worse than New Moon? Eclipse. What's worse than Eclipse? Breaking Dawn. What's worse than Breaking Dawn? The Holocaust. What's worse than the Holocaust? Breaking Dawn Part 2.

thumb_up thumb_down

The next sentence is true. The previous statement is false.

thumb_up thumb_down

ill take a bullet for you... on call of duty... nahhh that ruins my kd

thumb_up thumb_down

What's the difference between Rebecca Black and your mom? Nope! Chuck Testa.

thumb_up thumb_down

Why did the catholic preist take all the little boys out in the woods? They were going on a camping trip.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What did the judge say to the criminal? I sentence you to a life time of solitary confinement.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

John had 50 candy bars and he ate 45 what does he have...... Diabeaties

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Why did the pelican cross the road? The man did not reply because his mother recently died in a car accident while crossing the road. She also loved pelicans.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What's yellow and smells like cheese? Cheese.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

so a moose walks into a super market and asked the lady where can I find the potatoes the lady says isle five so the moose goes to isle five and there aint no potatoes.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops