What did the elephant say to the naked man? "Cute, cute, but can it pick up peanuts?"

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EVERYONE TEXT 513-550-3742 AND ASK HIM WHY HE HAS GOOP IN HIS PANTS. his names eric

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Why does my friend pick up trash? Because he is a garbageman

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Why did the skeleton not go to the party? Because without the aid of various ligaments and muscles that would be attached to the average human being's skeleton, he was not able to move himself so much as an inch.

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Why did the man commit suicide? He was depressed.

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Do they censor Ass? TESTING TESTING ASS ASS ASS

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How do you get free money? Hire a black man to rob a bank.

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You're such a retard, you have to take special education, live with a mother that doesn't know what to do with you, not understand the real world, and have people look at you strangely for the rest of your life.

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How do you call the uncle who molested you as a child? More than likely with a telephone.

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(two firefighters are climbing an undersea mountain in Brazil) Why do elephants fear the natural causes of silver icecream cones? Because the cars in the parking garage jump the moon while doing jumping jacks.

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Hey I just meet you. And this is crazy, but im a Zombie. And you looks tasty!

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How many blondes does it take to finish a math test? 1 if she isn't copying.

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How many feminists does it take to change a light bulb? That's not funny.

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Guy 1: So how did you get into hospital Guy 2: I was drinking near my computer Guy 1: So why did it explode? Guy 2: (Doesn't reply)

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Why did Johnny fall off his bike? His father never taught him how to ride one as he was an abusive alcoholic who abandoned Johnny's mother when Johnny was 3, so he is not very good at riding bikes.

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What's the difference between Chuck Norris and Bigfoot? Nothing. Their both really hairy.

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I have a really good knock knock joke. You start. Knock knock. Open the door see who it is and then slam the door in your face THE END

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How do you kill a blonde? Kick her off a cliff.

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What's old, silver, and smells like old cheese? A fork with old cheese on it.

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Why do ducks have flat feet? To stomp out forest fires Why do elephants have flat feet? To stomp out flaming ducks

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An Ethiopian fell into an alligator infested river. He ate 7 of them before he got out.

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Turkey Balls

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Why did the girl fall off the swings? -because she had no arms

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what do You call a white man killing a black man? a accident

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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