Kid 1 "Man this is the hardest poop i've ever taken." Kid 2 "Maybe it's because you ate the Happy Meal toys." Kid 1 "You know what? I think you're right. Commotion ensues as the toilet bowl fills with blood as the action figure has cut the inside of his large intenstine. He is screaming in pain. Kid 2 reacts quickly getting him to the hospital just making it in time before Kid 1 passes out. Thankfully he survives but has to get shrgery. Meanwhile, the family dog Buster decides to drink the blood poop water from the bowl and dies from poisining.

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Whats 9 plus 10? 19

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A black man was walking down the street wearing a ski mask. It was cold outside.

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Q How is it Going Patty? A:Hi Patrick hows it going?

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Who cut the cheese? It's sliced so evenly.

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Yo mama so fat when she dresses in red she looks like clifford the big red dog!

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Billy wanted a toy for Christmas. Sadly, Billy died before Christmas.

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I wonder what mute people say to themselves. :/

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Being ripped apart by an angry orangatang because orangatangs have the strength of ten men.

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Knock, knock. You do realize you can actually physically knock on the door instead of just imitating the sound effect with your mouth, right? It's actually way more effective that way. Just saying, since it's raining outside and you're cold and want to come in...

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what do u call a hairy cow? Harry

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How do you keep black people from your Kool-aid? How? You put it in a safe-deposit box.

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How high is the grass in Germany? Approximately the same height as the grass in America.

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What's hot and cold at the same time? Hotcold.

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What's worse than celery stuck between your teeth? A cruise ship stuck between your teeth.

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really? are people insistantly so totally stupid? Now read that again and you may notice something. :P

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Your mamas so fat that she went to the doctor and he said she has a very high case of diabetes so now she's trying to excerise more and watching what she eats.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to your house. Knock knock. Who's there? The chicken.

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What do u call a joke with no punchline? An anti-joke

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What's worse than a dead baby? What a sick question. Most would argue that nothing is worse than the death of an infant.

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Why did Billy fall off his bike? He tried to kill himself.

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too bad about that wild ball, you otherwise played a fantastic softball game

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what's white and long and hairy? -Dean when hes on his period

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How many Jehovah's Witnesses does it take to screw in a light bulb? 2. One to firmly hold the ladder and the other to cautiously screw it in. They are volunteering at the local orphanage and it is wrong to make fun of there religion. We are all different in our own special way.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops