If you're American when you go into the bathroom , and you're American when you go into the bathroom, what are you when you're in the bathroom. Ha, joke is on you because Americans don't pee.

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what happens when u fall down the stairs? you break your arm.

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Why did the chicken cross the road. grass was greener on the other side!

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What did the Watermelon say to its baby? I'll SEED you later!

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What did the dead woman say to the murderer nothing dead people cant talk

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I like to give help to people, expecting that they will be my slaves for life.

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Grandpa loved a good joke, he died laughing. The doctor said it was a severe stroke probably brought on by smoking aggravated by high cholesterol and high blood pressure.

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When the mom got home from work, she was very tired. Her 6 year old son asked her nicely to make him a PB&J sandwich. She said sure and made one. Her son was very pleased and ate all of it. He knew he had a great mom. I actually lied above. The mom was killed by three men in hoodies in her back yard. They came inside and also murdered to boy. Worst of all the killers stole all of her food including the rasberries the boy was looking forward to eat. I guess it doesn't matter now since he is unable to eat anymore...

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Why was the pedophile in jail? For indecent exposure to a child.

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How many Americans does it take to screw in a lightbulb? One.

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Roses are are red Violets are blue I just ate a crockpot!

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Knock knock Who's there? Jehovah's Witness

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Knock, knock! Who's there? No one. No one actually knocked on your door because this is just a joke.

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What can hurt you if you pee on it? A rabid grizzly bear

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i have a black man in my family tree. i am 25% african american among several other ethnicities.

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What's wet and pink? Bubblegum!

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Why did anna stop wanting to build a snowman? Beacuse she died of cancer.

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How did the black man burn down the house. He threw a flaming match through the window.

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Knock Knock... Who's there? Nine... Nine who? Nine Eleven.

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The President, The Pope, and a small child are all in an airplane when the pilot announces that the plane is going to crash. They crash into the ocean and quickly remember that there is a life vest under their seats, which they promptly put on and safely inflate after exiting the cabin of the aircraft by pulling down on one or both of the red tabs.

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why did Kanye interrupt Taylor Swift at the VMA's? because he had a little too much scotch before the ceremony

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what has two legs, and is red? half a cat.

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What do black people eat? What everyone else does!

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A Stoner sees a bag of chips.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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