Ask me if I'm a carrot Are you a carrot? No

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Is this your pen? I wanna go to school, bye!

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What is a pirates favorite crime? Piracy, which is still a serious problem in today's society.

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y was John so sad becaus his mom took his phone

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What did the cop say to the speeding black man? "Can I see your license and registration?"

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What do you call cheese that's not yours? Mine.

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Two elephants were out flying. Then one elephant said to the other: My grandmother has a pink toothbrush!

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Why did Suzie fall off the swings? Because she didn't have arms or legs. Knock, Knock. Who's there? Not Suzie

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What would kill a Muslim if they were to ingest it? Arsenic

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There is no "i" in "team," but there are two in "indigo."

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Is it a bird, Is it a plane, I don't know what it is but it's heading straight for the World Trade Centre

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Why did the little boy throw his clock out of the window? After hours of searching for the snooze button to no avail, the little boy became so irritated at the incessant ringing of the alarm that he threw it out of his window in a fit of rage. The clock landed on an old woman who was walking twenty stories below. She was immediately killed on impact.

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What do you call a fish with no eyes? A fsh

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Roses are red violets are blue make me a sandwhich so i can eat it

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Rose are red, Violets are blue, I have AIDS, Now so do you.

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What did the child molestor do? He went home and molested children.

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Why were Billy's parents laughing at him? Because he was just diagnosed with cancer!

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What did the black fire-fighter do when the house caught fire? The heroic man ran inside and got every animal and person inside to the out side and then proceeded to extinguish the flames with his fire-extinguisher out, thus saving most of the families valuables. He was then awarded a raise in his salary for his heroic valor. Although any fire-fighter could have done this because of the hard work and dedication that is put into training. So really describing the race that this heroic man is was totally pointless.

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Why doesn't Billy like his new step-dad? He's secretly a murderer and only Billy knows, he wants to tell the police but hes afraid to.

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A black guy, a jew, and an asian walk into a bar, have a beer each, and then leave, because they have high-paying jobs and don't want to risk getting DUIs.

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Let's play twenty questions. Alright, but I have to warn u I have piss running down my leg

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What's the worst part about being a black Jew? You have to sit at the back of the oven.

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What's black, white, and red all over? A lot of things, you just gotta keep your eyes peeled.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Who cares?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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