What do you call a cow with no legs. Dead, the farmer cut them off.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Did you know that there is a species of rodent capable of jumping higher than an average three-story building? This is due to its muscular hind legs and the fact that the average three-story building cannot jump.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Knock Knock. Who's there? Ya. Ya Who? Dot Com.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Lol! The connection timed out. Double D`s they kill my back so I am gonna get them reduced someday, and sure because it gets really itchy otherwise.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

An Englishman, an Irishman, a Frenchman, a Scottish man, an Australian, a German, a Spaniard, an Icelandic man, a Norwegian, a Swede, a Dane, an Italian, a Morrocan, an American, an Algerian, an Egyptian, a Syrian, an Israelite, a Chinese man, a Russian, a Japanese man, an Indian and a Brazilian all walk into a bar. It was a large bar.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

What's dark, scary, and full of puppies? My van. I lied about the puppies...

thumb_up thumb_down -20

roses are red violets are blue get out of my face before i kill you

thumb_up thumb_down -20

what happened to the boy who got hit by a truck he went to the hospitel

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Why did the girl fall off the swing? She had no arms. Why couldn't she get back up? She had no legs.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

what did the bus driver say to the black man when he got on the bus? nothing, carl has become very anti-social since his brother died

thumb_up thumb_down -22

What do you call a woman with one leg? I don't know. I am not in the position, currently, of knowing anyone who finds themselves in such an unfortunate condition.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

What did the boy with no arms and legs get for Christmas? A mechanical wheelchair.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Why was Jimi's mom sad? Because Jimi suddenly fell to the floor clenching his neck while saying "I'm Dying!"

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Why did Johnny fall off his bike? His father never taught him how to ride one as he was an abusive alcoholic who abandoned Johnny's mother when Johnny was 3, so he is not very good at riding bikes.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

why should you not shake a baby? because if it dies it wouldnt know that its parents hate them.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Why did the black man go through the window of the house? He left his keys inside

thumb_up thumb_down -24

Why did the gay man's ass hurt? He has rectal cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

red is black green is black i'm batman i'm white,

thumb_up thumb_down -24

So an Alex Gedrose walks into a bar, and orders peanut butter and jelly toast on buttermilk with extra Linda on the side.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

Why did the man fail to enter the CAPTCHA phrase correctly? Because he was actually a bot, and bots are typically prohibited from accessing information on most public web sites.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

What is white, red, and all in your girlfriend? red and white blood cells

thumb_up thumb_down -24

how did the kenyan get away from the cop He didnt he got arrested

thumb_up thumb_down -24

a man walks into a bar.... his? drinking problem is seriously affecting his family

thumb_up thumb_down -24

What did the black boy get for Christmas? Black people don't celebrate Christmas.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops