What is the similarity between John W. Booth and Pee Wee Herman? They both got arrested for shooting someone in the back of the head in the theater.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It couldn't handle the stress and pressure of being a duck so it committed suicide by crossing a road and therefor being run over by a car.

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There were two penguin's sitting in a bathtub. The first penguin says to the second penguin, "Hey, pass the soap." And the second penguin says, "What do i look like, an alarm clock?"

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A duck walks into a convenience store and asks for a tube of chapstick.He says "Put it on my tab".

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What did the ghost say to the black man? nothing. He just shot him.

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Q. How can you tell if your arm is broken? A. Break it.

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what do u call a kid at school a school kid and i have enough of these anti jokes they are not funny

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why did the family get sick?? because i fucked a girl with a parsnip then sold the parsnip to a family with 4 small children

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A man walks into a bar, buys a pint of beer, talks to his friends for while and leaves.

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What do Lincoln, JFK, and Barack Obama all have in common? They were all president of the United States of America and are relatively good people.

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i wonder who made this website? a human

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What's worse then getting followed by a creepy man in a van? Getting followed and raped by a creepy man in a van.

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What did the homeless man get for Christmas? Nothing.

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H2O corndogs running around naked CC

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It is hard to know things like that.

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whats cold, blue and hard? a frozen blueberry.

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Knock knock who's there atch watch who? bless you

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Im taking a shit right now.

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Two Muffins are in an oven the first Muffin says "whew it's hot in here." The other Muffin turns around and yells "Holy shit! I can talk too!"

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why does Tom Sawyer like apples? He likes their flavor

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Q: what do you call a deer with no eyes A; roadkill

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Why did the elephant cross the road? To run away from the angry chicken who was mad that he was slacking off work.

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why do jews like money? So they can support their family.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Well it all began in 1807 when a 7 foot rooster gave birth to a chicken on the sidewalk while purchasing ice cream. Scientists have been intrigued so they went into study with it and won the Nobel prize. This somehow persuaded them to lure the chicken over to the other side by using a lollipop. They threw the lollipop as the chicken crossed the road, hit it in the eye, the chicken spazzed out, jumped in front of a car, teleported to London, and is now a gynecologist.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops