1: Why did Suzie have no arms and no legs? 2: Why? 1: Knock Knock? 2: Who's there? 1: Not Suzie

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What did the alien say to the other alien? It's hard to say. They could use an inefficient form of aural analog communication, or a hyper-advanced form of telepathy. Either way, modern science hasn't brought us far enough to determine.

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What do you call man with no limbs or a head? Your neighbor.

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What do the Africans have for breakfast? Nothing.

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what did the blind, deaf, paraplegic child get for christmas? other than cancer, nothing.

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What's good about sex with twenty-three year olds? There's twenty of them.

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What's so similar about a zombie and a black man? They are both almost human.

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No smoking No eating No drinking On this bus Didn't say anything about sniffing

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Roses are brown Violets are brown I should probably water My garden soon.

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Roses are rose, violets are violet, that's just a fact, I've got aspergers.

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Roses are red, violets are blue, twilight is gay and Justi Bieber too.

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What do you call a black man driving a plane? A pilot, you racist.

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Why was the cat meowing at the chicken? Because Sally got hit by a fridge.

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Knock Knock Who's there? You have AIDS.

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What do you get when you cross a rhino and a whale? Comment your answer:

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Hey, I want to because you are really sweet and deserve it, and damn you are hot, but thats secondary in your case, in every case actually, otherwise I would just be doing it with meat whose soul and thoughts I hate/dislike/detest/etc, and that is not who I am. Once huh? I mean I said night/day/shower/breakfast table... Not so sure I can last for that long with a girl as hot and sweet as you for that long. Kidding, hey, best friend huh? Wow, I mean that`s really sweet, and you are really a special friend to me, but uh, to be honest, best friend? I barely know you... I hate this part of myself, I am blunt with that honesty thing, I may just have insulted you, but you know, I also need to be able to live with myself If I am going to enjoy life.

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A 65 year old man is tired with his life. He begins to realize that it is meaningless to him. He wants no part in the world anymore so he decided to commit suicide. On his way to commit suicide, he comes across a magical man that has an extraordinary offer. This magical man has offered to grant the 65 year old man the power to fly. The 65 year old man, accepts the offer in great interest, but the magical man wants something in return for his deed. The 65 year old man, offers all the money in his wallet to the magical man. The magical man accepts his offer of all the money and continues. With a flick of the wrist, the magical man says, "fly, fly, high as the sky, i grant this man the ability to fly". The 65 year old man is greatly excited now that he has the ability to fly. He cant wait to try out his new power. He runs to the nearest cliff and jumps. Too bad the "magical man" was really a male prostitute that was broke and homeless. The 65 year old man died on impact and the male prostitue walked away with a wallet full of cash.

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Whats brown and rhymes with snoop? Jay-z

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What did the hitler youth kid get for Christmas? An easy bake oven and a G.I. Jew.

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What's Black,White and red all over? A black person with a skin disease on her period.

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Roses are brown I likes clouds This joke isn't funny so don't laugh

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What's worse then a missed call from your dad? A missed call from your mom.

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What do you call a black man in green shoes and a yellow hat ? Nothing,thats just him pursuing in his own regular casual outfit there for you would just notice him as a normal man walking around with shoes and a hat on so there is nothing to call him

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Did you know, I have a black man in my family tree? He works for a lawn service.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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