Obesity runs in your family. To bad no one runs in your family.

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Why was the girl running? She had to catch her bus.

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why did the man commit scuicide because he was depressed

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What's upside down? umop apisdn

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A man walks in to a bar, Has a drink, and leaves.

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You're rowing a canoe upstream and a wheel falls off, how many pancakes can you fit in a dog house? None because icecream doesn't have bones.

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Why was a black man in a prison cell? He was a highly respected plumber fixing a prisoner's faulty toilet.

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Tim: Ya know what was wondering? Paul: What? Tim: Actually, I'm not wondering about it anymore.

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A man is walking on the beach and discovers a lamp in the sand. He takes it home to polish it. Eventually it looks like new and he gets a fairly reasonable price from an antique shop.

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How does Hitler tie his shoes? with little Nazis!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Listen, it's a free country.

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my friend got in a car wreck,he lost his left arm and left leg. how is he now? Hes all right.

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What did Timmy's mom think of his art project? Nothing, she screamed and called an ambulance because she saw that he had tripped and fallin onto a pair of scissors and they just so happened to peirce his heart.

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What's the difference between a Pimple and a Priest? One waits till you're 13 to "come" on your face.

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What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the Batmobile? Robin, get in the Batmobile.

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says "Why the long face?" The horse says "I have Cancer."

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Whats red and smells like blue paint? Red Paint

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What did the fat man say to the other far man Hey your fat

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Q) How do you kill a blue elephant? A) Shoot it with a blue elephant gun. Q) How do you kill a pink elephant? A) Hold its trunk until it turns blue, then shoot it with a blue elephant gun. Q) How do you kill a white elephant? A) Tickle it until it turns pink, hold its trunk until it turns blue, then shoot it with a blue elephant gun.

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You're so fake, Barbara Millicent Roberts is jealous of you.

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What's harder to pick up, a football or an anvil? It doesn't matter when you lost your fingers in 'nam.

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Why'd the chicken cross the road? Its not for us to determine its motive, i'm sure it has its reasons

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A priest, a pedophile and a rapist walk into a bar. He orders a drink.

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Today we eat large amounts of pizza. The one piece had a lot of mushrooms. Like more than the other pieces. The cheese was flawless except for the burnt edges.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops