Two men walk into a bar and begin ordering drinks. Both men engage in polite conversation with each other. At the end of the night they each take taxi's home because they realize the potential risk they pose to others if they drive intoxicated.

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Why did the man murder his wife? Because she would'nt do the the dishes

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What is brown and can't get an erection? Poo

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What is worse than being paralyzed from the neck down Nothing

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Why was a black man in a prison cell? He was a highly respected plumber fixing a prisoner's faulty toilet.

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Why was i sad when 4 black people in a cadillac fell over a cliff. The car blew up...

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there were two cyclists cycling down a main road in china at exactly the same time and exactly the same pace, one being chinese and the other irish. why did the irish man get stopped and the chinese man not? because the irish man had in fact raped and murdered a young child in his native home town and then fled the country to china.

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what is the difference between a jew and a boy scout? a boy scout comes home from camp

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what has two legs, and is red? half a cat.

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How do you find dennis ferguson? Look at danyons bckground

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: Because he was forced, along with thousands of his poultry counterparts, on a march to meet their imminent death at a mass slaughterhouse. Upon being beheaded and processed, the meaty corpse was delivered to a local grocery store and cooked into a wholesome family dinner.

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How do u get high, meet a leprachaun, and touch a rainbow? U find a leprechaun shoot him, steal his pot, and run up the rainbow silly!

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A grasshopper walks into a bar and no one notices because it's just a little insect.

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What do dragonflies do when they are a couple? One sits on the others head, causing the bottom dragonfly to have a loss of vision, and increases the weight on the bottom dragonfly, which increases the chance of both the dragonflies deaths.

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on a scale from voldemort to nigel thornberry, how big is your penis?

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Yo momma was so ugly that everybody died.

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the economy.

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What's brown and sticky? "A stick?" No, poo.

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Why is it so hard to find slim fitting clothes in America? Because not many clothing stores carry them.

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Why did the baby cross the road? It was stapled to the chicken.

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There were two penguin's sitting in a bathtub. The first penguin says to the second penguin, "Hey, pass the soap." And the second penguin says, "What do i look like, an alarm clock?"

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A guy went to McDonalds and asked for a cheeseburger: —Can I have a cheeseburguer? —No

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Yo mama so fat she makes blind kids cry

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A man walks in to a bar with a frog stapled to his head. The bar tender says What the heck is that. The frog says I don't know this thing has been coming out of my but for two days

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops