Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the Crossing Guard union had reached a collective agreement and they had returned to work and it was safe to cross once again.

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what do you call a boomerang that doesn't work? a stick

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Q: How many kids with ADD does it take to screw in a light bulb? A: Let's go ride bikes!

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Q: What did the black kid get for Chirstmas? A: Your bike

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Why did the little girl with no arms an legs cry? Because she fell off the swing.

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What is the biggest lie in the world How the **** should I know

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What do you do when life gives you lemons? Kindly reject the offer and give it back to life.

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What was John Lennon's last hit? The pavement.

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What do you do when your condom breaks during sexual intercourse? Get AIDS.

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What was the cancer patients last wish? For the pain to go away...Yolo...-Avery Scott Vartanian

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A man and a hobo meet on a narrow path. What does the hobo do? Finds the mans wife and impregnateds her, aborts the baby, takes dead fetus chops it up and makes the man eat it in a salad. While the man is chocking he shotes him and walks on.

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a dyslexic man walked his god.

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Kid: Mom I'm gonna dig a hole all the way to China! Mom: That's sweet but it's impossible dear. You'll get to tired after awhile to go any farther. Also, by any chance you did dig really deep, you would melt and die if you got the the center because the magma will kill you when you get to it. Alright son? Kid: What?

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If a man shouts in a forest and there is no woman around to hear him, is he still wrong? He could be. He could not be. The greater concern is that he's shouting alone in the forest. He's either in great danger or has a psychological disorder.

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What is green, red, and goes 70 mph? A frog in a blender

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Did I invite you to my birthday party? No. Then why are you at my birthday party?

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Person 1: Why can't a T-Rex clap? Person 2: BECAUSE THEIR ARMS ARE TOO SMALL! Person 1: No, because they are extinct dumbass

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See you later... Just joke I'm blind

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Why did the chicken have a sore neck? Because the farmer cut the chicken's head off, and the body ran around for three minutes until it finally bled to death.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Daisy's are white, Metallica.

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How do you get a blond out of tree? Shoot her in the head.

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What's worst than finding two worms in your apple? Two holocausts.

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roses are red, violets are blue, {insert name here} is f**ked up, (s)he want to have sex with you

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What's the most common way to become mentally challenged? Getting hit by a shovel a couple times

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops