my friend got in a car wreck,he lost his left arm and left leg. how is he now? Hes all right.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Listen, it's a free country.

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Tim: Ya know what was wondering? Paul: What? Tim: Actually, I'm not wondering about it anymore.

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Q) How do you kill a blue elephant? A) Shoot it with a blue elephant gun. Q) How do you kill a pink elephant? A) Hold its trunk until it turns blue, then shoot it with a blue elephant gun. Q) How do you kill a white elephant? A) Tickle it until it turns pink, hold its trunk until it turns blue, then shoot it with a blue elephant gun.

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Whats red and smells like blue paint? Red Paint

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says "Why the long face?" The horse says "I have Cancer."

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What did the fat man say to the other far man Hey your fat

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You're so fake, Barbara Millicent Roberts is jealous of you.

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A priest, a pedophile and a rapist walk into a bar. He orders a drink.

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Today we eat large amounts of pizza. The one piece had a lot of mushrooms. Like more than the other pieces. The cheese was flawless except for the burnt edges.

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Why'd the chicken cross the road? Its not for us to determine its motive, i'm sure it has its reasons

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What's harder to pick up, a football or an anvil? It doesn't matter when you lost your fingers in 'nam.

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A little boy walks into a bar its fine, he's over 21, he just looks younger.

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why does big tom run the dock because he knows how to speak to skiiers

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Q: Why does Billy get bullied at school? A: Because he has Down's Syndrome

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Why did the boy not answer his mums call? because he was dead

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What did one cannibal say to the other cannibal? Nothing, because he was eating him.

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What did Timmy's mom think of his art project? Nothing, she screamed and called an ambulance because she saw that he had tripped and fallin onto a pair of scissors and they just so happened to peirce his heart.

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What's the difference between a Pimple and a Priest? One waits till you're 13 to "come" on your face.

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What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the Batmobile? Robin, get in the Batmobile.

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What do you do if life gives you lemons? Whoa... where did these lemons come from?

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what did nena say in the library while her and her friends were on anti-jokes? I don't know. I wasn't there.

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What do you call a black guy doing community service? Someone who wanted to give back. Stop being racist.

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A guy went to McDonalds and asked for a cheeseburger: —Can I have a cheeseburguer? —No

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops