So my friend told me to go shot myself I got my Canon and shoot myself The image came out very clean and profession.

thumb_up thumb_down +43

Why did little Jimmy fall off his bike? Because I threw a fridge at him.

thumb_up thumb_down +37

A dog walks into a bar, followed by his blind owner.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Where do cows go on the weekends? The slaughterhouse.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

I'm rubber and you're glue, neither one of us say anything because inanimate objects can't talk.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

What is black white and red all over? A zebra which a lion did not finish eating.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Why didn't little jimmy take out the trash? He is a rock

thumb_up thumb_down +21

A women driver prepares to park in a small space between to cars on the side of a road. She safely and flawlessy parallel parks, and proceeds to enter a nearby coffe shop for an important business meeting.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Why did Shrek eat the onions? Anyone who has seen the Shrek films would know that Shrek never mentions anything about eating onions. In the first movie, Shrek and donkey have a conversation in which he compares himself to an onion, but the scene lasts maybe a minute and never again does Shrek mention onions in any way, shape, or form. For whatever reason, this one scene has turned onions into the strongest signature icon associated with Shrek.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Why did Jimmy drop his ice cream? Because he was hit by a bus Knock Knock Who's there? Not Jimmy -thatcooltyguy

thumb_up thumb_down +17

How did the person die? He got hit by a car.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

What's better than a stick? A stone

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Why did the girl fall off the swing? She had no arms. Why couldn't she get up? She had no legs. Why did noone help her up? She was fat.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

What do you call a fridge painted red and brown? A fridge.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

what is purple and smells like poop? very weird looking poop

thumb_up thumb_down +15

What was the black woman doing in the kitchen? She was simply washing her hands after eating dinner.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

How do you fit 100 dead babies in a box? A blender. How do you get them out? Tortilla Chips. hehehehehehe

thumb_up thumb_down +13

A cripple and a Jew walk into a bar. They sit down and begin to discuss all the stigmas that they have faced their entire lives. The conversation goes on for an hour, at which point a black man walks in. Just then, the bar explodes and they all die.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Roses are red Violets are blue I've got to say I hate you!

thumb_up thumb_down +13

what does pedobear get for christmas ? nothing he's the one giving love to all kids .

thumb_up thumb_down +11

my penis

thumb_up thumb_down +11

What happens when a truck full of mexicans and a truck full of aisians collide? They all die.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Three black men walk into a gas station and don't steal anything.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

What's nappy,brown,intoxicated,and stealing my bike? A Blazed, black guy that stole my bike.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops