How did bill lose his legs he got them amputated after contracting a severe case of "INeedToGetMyLegsAmputatedSyndrome"

How did Helen Keller's parents punish her? They beat her mercilessly.

What's yellow and smells like cheese? Cheese.

Why did the man fall off his bike? He ran into a pile of dead babies.

Where can you find a tetraplegic? Where you left him.

What is the difference between a jew and a boyscout? A boyscout comes back from camp.

What do you say when you see a black guy? Hello,how are you today?

So a Buddhist said, "YOLO." ._.

What do lazy asses get for Christmas? Fat

Q:how do you save a black guy from drowning A: you shoot him

Your mom is so fat..., that she died of a heart attack at an early age and everyone mourned her greatl

Two Muffins are in an oven the first Muffin says "whew it's hot in here." The other Muffin turns around and yells "Holy shit! I can talk too!"

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Half a worm... What's worse than finding half a worm in your apple? Being Gang-raped!

Why did Sara fall off the swing? -She had no arms *Knock Knock* Who's there? -Not Sara!

YOU KNOW YOU'RE AS FAT AS JESSE WHEN... 1. The scales don't go up to the weight you weigh. 2. You know the true meaning of the word Plus-Size. 3. You can't see your feet without sitting down.

What's under there? I'm not falling for that one...

A man walked in to a store and asked for four candles. The storeman brought some fork handles and placed them on the counter. The customer said "No... 'Four Candles' a rather amusing sketch performed by The Two Ronnies, a comedy double act in the 1970s."

Q: why are black people so much darker than white people? A: genetics.

what did the african man have for breakfast? Ebola cereal.

What's the difference between your dog and your mother? Your dog doesn't think you're a disgrace to the family

What's the difference between Paris Hilton and a cow? Cows are ruminants, meaning that they have a digestive system that allows use of otherwise indigestible foods by regurgitating and rechewing them as "cud". Paris Hilton, on the other hand, is a human being. Therefore, her stomach digests the bolus (masticated food) only after it has exited the oesophagus into the body of the organ, where it is digested into chyme and then passed through the pyloric sphincter into the duodenum.

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor Wheres my tractor?

H2O corndogs running around naked CC

TOYS TOYS TOYS IN THE ATTIC

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...