Q. what is your favorite food? A. Chicken, burritos, sandwich, rice, hot dog, turkey, duck, carrot, broccoli, eggplant, apple, blueberry, pear, raspberry, blackberry, orange, grapes fries, chips, cheese, pretzels, worms, and candy canes.

How many Jehovah's Witnesses does it take to screw in a light bulb? 2. One to firmly hold the ladder and the other to cautiously screw it in. They are volunteering at the local orphanage and it is wrong to make fun of there religion. We are all different in our own special way.

A white man and a black man enter a public toilet. When they both begin to pee, the white man looks over at the black man. He is dissappointed to find that the black man's penis is not large according to stereotype, and then feels slightly depressed over his closet homosexuality. Both men leave the toilet and never see eachother again. The white man cries himself asleep that night. 'I've been hiding too long' he thinks.

What's worse than a dead baby? What a sick question. Most would argue that nothing is worse than the death of an infant.

Whats black and white and red all over? Genital Warts...

Why was Osama Bin Laden so hard to find? His hiding place was difficult to come across.

Q: Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? A: Getting mauled by a pack of hungry wolves

too bad about that wild ball, you otherwise played a fantastic softball game

Why did the black man cross the road? He was chasing the chicken

Why couldn't the girl go to the bathroom? Because she was obese.

what's white and long and hairy? -Dean when hes on his period

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 was a registered sex offender who recently got out of federal prison after a 20 year sentence.

What did one dog say to the other? Nothing silly...dogs can't talk.

What did the Germans cook in their giant oven made for cooking jews? Jews.

roses are red, hills are green. i know you're ugly and i know I'm so mean.

Did you hear about that anthony weiner guy. He is very depressed, and your mother has cancer.

Know what im sayin'? No but im wearing pants

An American man and a Chinese man have a conversation. The American man asks the Chinese man after a couple of minutes of speaking, "How long have you lived in the United States?" The Chinese man replies, "I moved to the United States when I was ten years old."

What did the dying man say to his friends? Nothing. He had no friends.

Q: Whats metal and shiny? A: You're lame childhood accomplishments.

What do you call a black hitch hiker: stranded

Why didnt the boy go to school? His mum threw a fridge at him!

Your momma smells so bad that she purchased arm and hammer products to improve upon her natural scent.

My Japanese girlfriend dumped me today...Oh well, theres plenty more in the sea

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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