what do you do when life gives you lemons? take them, free shit is cool!

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Hollywood presents: In a world... Where darkness and crime is at every corner... The governments darkest secret... MUST... BE... UNLEASHED! Jack Kirby: So, with this technology I can swallow criminals and gain their abilities? But is there not a lot wrong with this? Hollywood: Meh... Sorry, we are gonna go with The Fast and The Furious 64: Mario Kart style.

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What's 1+5 2+4 3+3 4+2 5+1 Whats 6+1 If you said 6 you're stupid.

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Knock Knock Who's there Boo Boo who Boo I'm a ghost atleast act scared

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Why did the man die when he hugged the pillow? He was hallucinating at the grand canyon.

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what do you call a bunch of crap at the bottom of the ocean? A shitwreck!

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what do you call a cat that cant meow? Charlie Sheen.

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Why was the girl unhappy with her male teacher? Because he gave her a bad grade...and raped her the night before.

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Q-Why did the little boy feel hot? A-Because he faceplanted into a bonfire.

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Why did the Mexican mow lawns? He needed money to pay for his college tuition.

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Why is the bowler right handed? He has no left hand.

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The Grinch stole Christmas, he accidentally dropped it and Christmas was ruined for everyone life sucked -shane,Adam,David and Riley go cry about it

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock, knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

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Why did the black man steal an inhaler? Because he was broke and he had asthma.

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I Couldn't afford a hair cut... so i purpposely contracted HIV

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a man decided to climb a tree. he got to the top,raised his arms above his head and said "I am on top of the world ". after that he fell because he was not holding on to anything

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How do you get your lawyer to shut up. Hit him with a bat.

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So FDR walks into a bar.

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what do u call a black guys dick a pogo stick

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Whats the difference between a black man and a bucket of shit? The bucket.

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Haikus are easy, But sometimes they don't make sense, Refrigerator Sex

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There are two cows in a field. One cow says to the other - 'Are you afraid of the mad cow disease?' The other cow says - 'No, cuz I'm a duck.'

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"So, what do you fancy doing tonight?" "Does it matter? We'll end up doing what you want anyway..."

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What did the lawyer say to the other lawyer? We are both lawyers.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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