What do you call a mailman who doesn't deliver mail? Unemployed

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A blonde asks, "How come i cant get this to go in there?" However no one replies because no one is there.

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A mushroom walks into a bar. The bartender says "We don't serve your kind here." The mushroom says, "What? I'm a fungi." The bartender replies, "Exactly. That's a health hazard. The health department already gave two strikes and if I lose the bar my wife will divorce me."

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What do you call a black man on the moon? An astronaut.

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Why'd Sally fall of the swing? Sally's a fish.

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Q. What do you call a headless boy in a river A. A headless boy, in a river.

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What type of party do you throw when your fat? A baby shower.

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What do you call a person with one eye and no arms? Names.

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good morning. good day. good night. good to see you santa

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All of these jokes are about white people

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How many zombies can you kill at once? about one or two unless your Chuck Norris with unlimited powers.

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woman's rights

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A man rode into town on Friday and came out on Friday how did he manage this? He stayed for a couple of hours

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What is the difference between Acenaphthoquinone and Acetoguanamine? I don't know...

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Thats so awesome, I was totally not not going to tell you and when I saw I did not not type it I totally did it anyways, but why did it last even though stuff timed out? I am like so wet.

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How did the black man burn down the house. He threw a flaming match through the window.

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HAVING OTHER LESBIAN'S OVARIES C AUGHT A AROUND U MBRELLAS SITTING TREES

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what did the crow say do the dead gazelle? - nothing the crow ate it

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How are elephants and plumbs the same? A: They are both purple, except for the elephant.

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Knock knock Who's there? Dave, I've got a fucking gun. Let me the fuck in.

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Chuck Norris has normal human strength.

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A quadriplegic walked into a bar, and... oh, whoops, nevermind.

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A Redhead, a Blonde, and a Brunette are all standing on top of a cliff in Ireland. They took a few pictures, and all in all it was a lovely vacation.

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Q) How do you kill a blue elephant? A) Shoot it with a blue elephant gun. Q) How do you kill a pink elephant? A) Hold its trunk until it turns blue, then shoot it with a blue elephant gun. Q) How do you kill a white elephant? A) Tickle it until it turns pink, hold its trunk until it turns blue, then shoot it with a blue elephant gun.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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