What does a lonely man do on opposite day? I don't know. Why should we know what he does, that is both weird and illegal. Stalking is a serious crime and should not be used. We do not know what he does on normal days, thus we cannot come to a conclusion to this question. However, I do hypothesize that he must be social on this day because this is the opposite of lonely.

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What's worse than stepping on a piece of gum? A clown following you around all day throwing toothbrushes at you. ___ Zertop™

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If a canoe is stuck in a tree with its headlights on, howmany pancakes does it take to cover the roof of my house? False, snakes don't have armpits!

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whats black red and white. a zebra with a contagious red rash

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Why does Michael J. Fox always have his martinis shaken? He thinks they taste better that way.

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How many licks does it take to get to the tootsie-roll center of a tootsie-pop? zero if you bite it

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Why did the bus driver tell the black man to get to the back of the bus? Because all the seats up front were full and its dangerous to stand in a moving vehicle

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Bill: Hey Bob guess what? Bob:What? Bill: your adopted

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Remember that comic blooper? Captain America fighting some dude: Okay buster only one of us is getting out of here alive! Next panel: Captain is kicking his foe and yelling AND IT WONT BE MEEEEEEEE! ...

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Joseph Coney could die... or worse... he could do anything but that....

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Justin Bieber tries to get into a club but is not allowed because he is to young.

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why did so many people die in the typhoon in the Philippines because they had to finish there math homework

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a man was walking out side to get the news paper what happened next he picked up the newspaper

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Knock Knock Whos there? Knock knock? Whos there? Knock knock. WHOS IS THERE?!?!? Knock Knock is, my name is Knock Knock.

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You know what sucks? A vacuum.

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Why did Jimmy drop his ice cream? Because he was hit by a bus Knock Knock Who's there? Not Jimmy -thatcooltyguy

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Disreguard Females Aquire Currency

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Your mom is so fat she probably has a body mass index of between 25 and 30 which is considered to be "overweight" but paradoxically is associated with fewer health risks by medical professionals.

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Yo' mama's so poor that she can't afford many of the privileges of everyday life.

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a brick cheats on another brick the brick finds out and dose nothing because it is a brick

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A man in a state penitentiary drops his soap. He then picks it up and continues his shower.

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whats green and red green and red green and red? a frog in a blender.

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Looks like this is a *puts on sunglasses* Pair of sunglasses

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To slaughter your entire family.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops